A Twisted Tale From A Broken Heart
by fosforito
Summary: The story is about Dr. Jonathan Crane starting with his years at high school college, having a friendship to a girl also an outsider like him and the relationship is now turning into first love. COMPLETED, PLEASE LEAVE FEEDBACK!
1. The rain

**Chapter 1 (The Rain)**

They managed to reach the roofed bench right on time, just as the rain started coming down.

They hurried up the hill near the small lake, where they had spent the whole afternoon and had just reached the bench when it started to rain. But it didn't help at all - Jonathan and Alexandra were now soaked to the skin and the water kept running down at their necks and through their hair. Even the books in their hands were wet.

"Damn it!", Alexandra cursed, after she noticed that her ink-written notes for her upcoming physics-exam had gotten wet and the ink had smeared all over the paper.

She started to shake out her notepad, trying to stop it from getting worse. Jonathan just watched.

"Hold on, this doesn't make any sense, what you're doing", he finally said. "Let's put the stuff on the bench."

He put his books on the bench and without saying anything, took Alexandra's stuff out of her hands to place it beside his own. Because of the rain and the sudden change in the temperature, Jonathan's glasses had gotten wet and were now fogging up. Alexandra looked at Jonathan putting down the books and the notepads on the bench and started to laugh. Jonathan was irritated.

"What is it?", he asked harshly and looked up at Alexandra.

He hadn't even noticed that his glasses were foggy. Jonathan was angry about the fact that he tried to _save_ their notes and that Alexandra hadn't anything better to do than to laugh at him.

"I don't find this funny!", Jonathan hissed. "I'm trying to keep our stuff safe and dry and you're making your fun of me!"

His bright blue eyes blazed with anger – even through his now-foggy glasses. Alexandra bit on her lower lip to suppress her laughter. Jonathan had completely misunderstood her.

"Jonathan!", she said, trying to suppress the laughter welling up inside, "Your glasses are completely steamed up! I really appreciate you making such a valiant effort for our books – but you possibly can't see anything anymore!"

Jonathan paused for a moment.

"Oh!", he said finally and a smile whisked over his lips.

Both looked at each other – at least Jonathan pretended to do so, but he really couldn't see anything – and burst out laughing.

"I'm so sorry...", Alexandra said, roaring with laughter as Jonathan took off his glasses to clean them with his shirt, "but that looked so funny: _the blind saviour of the books_!"

"Hahah!", Jonathan answered with a huge grin on his face and his eyes started sparkling again – only this time, not because of anger. He checked his glasses with a glance and started to put them on again. Alexandra touched his arm.

"No, don't!"

Jonathan looked at her.

"Your shirt is wet and your glasses aren't properly dry anyway.. and... you look so nice without them.."

"Thank you..", Jonathan said in a low voice as he glanced at Alexandra, folded up his glasses and put them away into the pocket of his wet shirt.

"And.. you have such a beautiful smile, do you know that, Jonathan Crane?", Alexandra added.

He gazed into her eyes.


	2. Rememberance Pt I

**Chapter 2 (Rememberance Pt. I) **

_Both had known each other for 4 years now, since Alexandra had first become Jonathan's new classmate. _

_He could still remember very well when and how they first met._

_Jonathan was in the hallway at school, opening his locker to get out his books for the next class when suddenly, a hand grabbed the collar of his shirt and pushed him against the locker next to his own. _

"_Now look who's here!", Jonathan heard the dark, strong voice of a boy. _

_It was the voice of Gary Merrill, a tall, good-looking guy, quarterback on the Gotham High School Football Team, class swaggerer – and somebody who enjoyed waylaying Jonathan to beat him up frequently. It seemed that today would be one of those days again. Gary didn't care about being seen in the school's hallway, as no one of the passing students would dare interrupt him. Jonathan tried to break away, but Gary kept his hold on him and pushed him back so hard, Jonathan hit the locker's door with a crash. Gary grabbed Jonathan's throat and pushed his head against the locker door. Jonathan gasped for breath. Gary's pal Matt, who was standing next to them the whole time, grinned maliciously. He was on the lookout in the hallway, to warn Gary if one of the teachers should come up. _

"_You little rat, you freak!", Gary hissed and pushed Jonathan harder against the locker. "I'm sick of seeing your mug and have been, for a long time now."_

_  
"Gary, I.. can't breathe...!", gasped Jonathan and tried to break away from Gary's death-grip. _

_But the more he struggled, the tighter Gary's hold on Jonathan's throat became. Gary grabbed Jonathan's glasses with the other hand, grabbed them off his face and let them fall down on the floor. Jonathan heard the cracking of his glasses under Gary's foot._

_  
"You should take damn good care of yourself, otherwise it won't be only your glasses next time!", Matt bawled and laughed. _

_  
"Yeah, exactly!", Gary added and both friends laughed maliciously, as Jonathan's eyes filled up with tears. His face blushed and he gasped for breath. _

"_Hey! You there! Let the boy go!", a clear voice suddenly yelled behind them. _

_Gary and Matt turned around. At the entrance, there stood a young girl, looking at them. They had never seen her before._

_  
"Hey, what do you want!", Gary hissed, obviously angry at the fact that someone dared interrupt him, "Mind your own business, you silly girl!"_

_  
"I said, let the boy go!", the girl repeated in a firm voice. _

_Gary loosened his grip around Jonathan's throat, but didn't completely release him. Jonathan gasped for breath and began to cough. The malicious grin had vanished off of Matt and Gary's faces. Matt planted himself squarely before the girl as Gary's eyes blazed with anger._

"_I'm sorry, the little chick didn't understand.", Matt said with a glance at Gary. "Maybe we should explain how thing's happen around here." B_

_oth started to grin again and Matt was about to step forward, towards the girl when he saw her putting her hand on the fire-alarm knob right next to her._

_  
"Well – give it a try then!", the girl said again in a firm voice, still looking at Gary and Matt._

_Matt stopped. For a few seconds they looked at each other. Finally Matt said, "You know what, Gary? I think we've had enough fun for today!"_

_  
Gary looked first at the girl, then at Matt and finally at Jonathan. He knew that if she were to release the alarm, all the doors of the classrooms would fly open immediately and the hallways would be filled up with students and teachers within seconds. Even if he wanted to, he wouldn't have the chance to "clear up" matters, neither with Jonathan nor with the girl. _

_Gary nodded, then pulled around Jonathan so hard that he stumbled over Gary's legs and fell on the ground. _

_  
"That was a close shave, Scarecrow!", Gary hissed, disgruntled, turning around to the girl. "And you too should take good care of yourself!" he yelled at her. _

_The girl didn't respond – simply scowled. Her eyes blazed with anger._

_The girl still had her hand on the alarm knob as Gary and Matt started to move to leave the hallway. They started laughing maliciously again and kicked at Jonathan's books, which had fallen on the floor, when he was attacked. Jonathan was still lying on the floor, panting. When Gary and Matt were out-of-sight, the girl walked over to Jonathan and knelt down next to him. She put her books on the floor and helped Jonathan get up on his knees. Some of the students passing by were watching them, but no one said anything or even tried to help. Jonathan leaned against the locker door, trying to stand up, rubbing his hurting throat. It burned like hell and Jonathan started to cough again. _

"_Calm down...", the girl whispered and touched Jonathan's shoulder softly. _

_Then she began to pick up his books, scattered all over in the hallway. Jonathan paused for a moment and then started to help her._

_  
"Thanks, but I can handle it." It was embarrassing, just sitting here and watching the girl pick up his stuff. _

_  
"No problem.", answered the girl, without looking up. _

_As Jonathan reached out to pick up a book lying next to him, the girl picked up his glasses. Thanks to Gary's kick, a small piece had broken off and one of the glasses was cracked. The girl held Jonathan's glasses in her hands like a precious treasure and put them carefully into Jonathan's hands. Their hands touched lightly for a moment and the girl gazed into Jonathan's eyes._

_  
_"_Thank you.." Jonathan whispered in a light trembling voice. _

_He didn't know why, but the girl's gaze made him a bit nervous. _

"_Who were those idiots, the guys bothering you?", the girl asked and helped Jonathan get up on his feet. _

_  
"Our class swaggerer and his best pal.", Jonathan answered. _

_He glanced shortly at the broken glasses in his hands. Meanwhile the girl had picked up all books from the floor._

_  
"I have to thank you..", started Jonathan. "I think you may have saved my life.."_

_  
"You're welcome", the girl said and smiled, and offered him her hand. "My name is Alexandra – Alexandra Wentzler"._

_  
"Jonathan Crane", he answered with a light smile, shaking her hand. _

_Alexandra – what a beautiful name that is!´ Jonathan thought, still holding her hand. _

_Had all this really happened? Had this girl he had never seen before really helped him, really defended him? This moment was something completely new to Jonathan, but he didn't feel bad - quite the opposite._

_Who was she? Where had she come from? Alexandra told Jonathan that she had recently moved here from Germany and today was her first day at Gotham High School. _

_  
"I was looking for the math classroom but I think I got lost.", Alexandra said, looking at Jonathan inquiringly. _

_His face brightened up._

_  
"Hey, you are in my class then!", he said and he noticed a tone of joy in his voice. _

_Alexandra smiled lightly. Jonathan hated Gary and Matt for what they had done to him today, but although he knew that today he had possibly been in real danger, at the same time he was grateful for today's incident, because it had brought Alexandra into his life – and this was by far the best thing that had happened to him in a long time._


	3. Rememberance Pt II

**Chapter 3 (Rememberance Pt. II)**

With Alexandra, the only friend, his only pal Jonathan ever had came into the class.

Someone to talk to about everything, someone who listened to him. Someone who accepted him the way he was. Jonathan never had been popular. To the others, he just was this strange, skinny guy, the swot, the freak, the Scarecrow. Into his world, made up of insults and awful beatings, into this world now there came someone, who didn't yell Scarecrow after him, who didn't make fun of his old, worn-out clothes, who didn't waylay him in the school hallways or somewhere else to beat him up.

It was quite the opposite. Alexandra even had a fight with another classmate to defend Jonathan. But not only him - Alexandra also had to defend herself frequently against other's attacks. Not only because of Jonathan, but also because of her German heritage.

She had recently moved with her family from Wiesbaden to Gotham. Alexandra had been born in the States, but had spent most of her life in other countries. Her father, a diplomat, was frequently sent from one place to another, and with him Alexandra and his family. To some students of Gotham High, it was reason enough to tease her – and the fact that "_the Kraut" _was hanging around with "_the Freak_" was simply the "icing on the cake".

At the beginning Alexandra was teased a lot and sometimes she even got beaten up. But she never got herself down and defended herself every time. One day she was – again – attacked by the class swaggerer, Gary. It came to a fistfight and Alexandra managed to give the tall guy such a well-aimed hit that he fell dazed on the floor.

Jonathan still could see the moment as clearly as if it had been yesterday, how Alexandra had stood over Gary with her clenched fists, yelling, "So, is anyone here, who wants to call me _the Kraut_ again!"

After this, no one ever touched Alexandra, nor she had been called _the Kraut,_ again. She wasn't a complete outsider as Jonathan was, she wasn't even everybody's darling - but she was respected. This also had its effect on her friendship with Jonathan, because every time she was anywhere near him, he wasn't attacked by anybody. Of course, people still kept whispering behind their backs and Alexandra's comment to this was just:

"_A Kraut and a Freak?... stranger things have happened before this yet"_

Although Jonathan never told her and although they never talked about it – he admired Alexandra's courage. He was glad to have her as his friend – and not least, as his guardian angel. Indeed, he was proud of her.

Now, this 16 year old girl, his guardian angel, the girl who had become so important to him for the last 4 years – this girl was now standing in front of him, soaked to the skin, on a rainy Saturday afternoon. They had been studying together for their physics exam. To Jonathan, it wasn't hard to understand the subject. He was into the sciences and he was good at it. But Alexandra had struggled with the material and he knew that. So to _him _it was a way of helping her this time and to do something good for her..

"_You have such a beautiful smile, do you know that, Jonathan Crane?"_


	4. The Kiss

**Chapter 4 (The Kiss)**

Jonathan still heard those words in his head.

A thrill of joy ran through his body and Jonathan felt like the ground was slipping out from under his feet. He wanted to hear them again, these words...

_please say them again, my angel, say them again..´_ flashed through Jonathan's mind and he gazed directly into Alexandra's eyes.

Alexandra felt a shiver running down her back. His eyes - his beautiful blue eyes...  
Alexandra looked to the ground, blushing.

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to..."

"No, it's okay!", stuttered Jonathan and touched lightly her arm. "That was a nice compliment and.. I'm really happy...because it came from you..I mean..."

How was it that this brave girl had suddenly lost her courage? And how was it that he was so nervous, stuttering like hell?

Alexandra looked up. Jonathan still kept a light hold on her arm. His gaze started to flip around nervously from one side to the other and Jonathan started to move his hands up on Alexandra's arms, up to her neck, her face, as if he was about to fall and was searching for a new hold.

"...I wanted to say.. I just wanted to say, that ...", stuttered Jonathan looking on the ground, then he paused and looked again at Alexandra with a firm gaze. ".. I… thank you..."

For a short moment they just looked at each other. Jonathan touched Alexandra's face with his hands, trying to wipe off a drop of water running down from her forehead to her nose and cheek. He caressed her cheek, then ran his fingers through her wet hair and then caressed her cheek again.

Alexandra also had her arms around Jonathan's hips, pulling him lightly closer to her. She put her hand to his cheek. Jonathan's thick black hair was wet from the rain and the water ran down Alexandra's hand. Jonathan's face was right in front of hers - she felt his hot breath on her skin, saw his deeply blue eyes, his full trembling lips. He was so beautiful. She had wanted him for such a long time now, but she couldn't ever tell him. She wanted Jonathan, she wanted to feel him. Alexandra embraced him harder, pulling him closer to her...

_please Jonathan, hold me..´_

Alexandra's heart throbbed wildly and she noticed, Jonathan's did the same when she put her hand onto his chest and felt his beating heart. Jonathan felt his body trembling ..

_please don't stop, Alex, hold me close.. I want to kiss you, I want to feel your body, I want to...´ _

"Jonathan..", Alexandra whispered softly, and their lips touched, first very slightly, then Jonathan pulled Alexandra even closer to him and their lips hit in a hot fervent kiss. A wave, powerful, like an explosion ran through their bodies. Alexandra hugged Jonathan tightly, so tight that she feared she was hurting him. Her heart throbbed like crazy and her breathing got faster and faster, as Jonathan's breathing got faster and heavier. He started to kiss her on her cheeks, her forehead, her throat, her neck and he was searching her lips over and over again ...


	5. The Escape

**Chapter 5 (The Escape)**

Suddenly the wind hissed through their emergency roofing and the rain hit Alexandra and Jonathan full force.

They hadn't noticed that it had kept on raining the whole time and they also hadn't noticed the weather had gotten worse. The sudden wind and the heavy rain assailed them and the shock separated Alexandra and Jonathan out of their embrace and their kiss.

"Damn! The weather's gotten worse!", Jonathan shouted, trying to protect his face with his arm from the lashing rain.

"What shall we do?", Alexandra yelled back and grabbed the books, which were starting to move across over the bench because of the heavy wind.

"We've got to get away from here!", yelled Jonathan and grabbed the rest of the books on the bench.

It seemed like the sky would fall down, the rain lashed so heavily and the wind roared. Alexandra and Jonathan were having trouble trying to not get blown away.

"Come on!", Jonathan shouted and grabbed Alexandra's hand. "There is a cabin nearby, we can stay there!"

"What!" Alexandra couldn't understand anything Jonathan said.

"Come on! Let's go!", he yelled and pulled at Alexandra's hand.

With the books in their hands and trying to protect themselves against the rain, they both started to run. The rain was turning into hail now and rattled down on them without mercy. Alexandra didn't know where Jonathan wanted to go, he just kept her hand in his, running along a small path leading to the forest.The ground was slippery and wet because of the rain and Alexandra was having trouble following and keeping up with Jonathan.

"We're almost there!", he shouted and moved from the path to a even narrower one, whose condition was even worse than the first one.

Alexandra didn't know this path at all and she wondered if Jonathan was really sure he was going the right way. Suddenly Alexandra twisted her foot, lost her balance and fell down into the mud. The books fell out of her hand into the mud, too. Jonathan, holding her hand all the time, stopped abruptly because of her tumble.

"Oh shit, damn it!", Alexandra yelled and touched her right ankle.

"Are you hurt?", Jonathan shouted and tried to help her to get to her feet again.

"It's my ankle!"

"Wait, let me help you. Don't give up ..there're only a few more meters left!"

Alexandra picked up the books, and Jonathan placed her arm around his neck. They continued running and limping. Alexandra cursed and swore out of anger and pain. Nevertheless Jonathan was right. Just a few meters ahead was a cabin, right at the edge of the forest, in a corner, barely to be seen.


	6. The Cabin

**Chapter 6 (The Cabin)**

Both arrived at the door, panting heavily.

Jonathan rattled at the door and at first it wouldn't open. All this while, the weather didn't let up – it even got worse. Jonathan pushed his slender body against the door to open it. Alexandra did the same to help him.

The door finally opened, but so fast, that Alexandra and Jonathan fell into the cabin headfirst. The wind and the rain roared into the cabin. Jonathan and Alexandra quickly stepped in and pushed heavily against the door to try and close it. They really had to fight against the wind and the rain, but managed to finally close the door. They leaned against the door, panting and coughing, happy about having made it here, happy about being safe. Jonathan looked at Alexandra, squeezed her hand softly and smiled. Both still were gasping for air. Alexandra smiled too and placed a kiss on Jonathan's hand.

Suddenly they heard a loud noise - the small windows of the cabin flew open and now the rain and the wind roared through the windows.

"Shit!", shouted Jonathan and struggled to his feet.

Alexandra did the same, although her ankle hurt. Jonathan jumped to one window to close first the shutters and then the window itself. Alexandra tried to help him.

"No!", Jonathan shouted. "Look for matches or something. We'll need some light, otherwise we'll just be sitting here in the dark!" He paused and looked at her. "Don't worry. I'll handle this here!"

"Okay!", Alexandra started to look around in the cabin looking for matches.

In the meantime, Jonathan tried to close all shutters and windows.

The noise of the storm outside was barely heard now, but all daylight had disappeared from the cabin. But because of the big trees nearby it didn't make a big difference, as there wasn't much daylight in the cabin anyway.

Alexandra found a big matchbox and an old oil lamp. Its small flame got bigger and bigger and little by little the cabin brightened up. Jonathan was sitting on the floor; his upper body leaned against the cabin's wooden wall. Alexandra turned around, holding the oil lamp in her hand. The cabin's furniture was plain. There was a small table with two stools, a hammock tabbed across the room and there was a small oven, a cupboard and a shelf. Jonathan looked at Alexandra and smiled lightly.

"So, are you going to tell me how you knew about this cabin?", Alexandra asked him.

She had never been here before, and she knew this area very well. Jonathan grinned and Alexandra recognized a knavish grin on his face – the first time in all this years.

"This is my secret cabin", he said and his grin became wider. "I bring all the little girls here to seduce them."

"Ha, very funny!", panted Alexandra and limped across to Jonathan to sit down next to him.

She knew he was just kidding, but Jonathan usually wasn't someone who kidded around. This was more her _speciality_'. Jonathan had more a dry and sarcastic sense of humour. A lot of people had their problems with it, even Alexandra, but sometimes he really could make her laugh. But this joke wasn't really funny, as Jonathan only was one year older than Alexandra.

Jonathan told her about a man named Alec, a deer hunter and the owner of the cabin. He always stayed in the mountain during spring and summer, and then came back to spent the rest of the year in the cabin.

"He's an old odd guy..", Jonathan admitted. „ - just like me."

"Yeah, you're odd – but you're not old.", Alexandra said and tried to change her position as she suddenly felt the pain again in her ankle.

Jonathan's expression darkened. "Looks like you've badly hurt your ankle.. let me see it."

"No, it's okay", Alexandra said.

"No, it's not!", interrupted Jonathan and sat up. "I got to check this...but first we gotta get rid of our clothes."

Alexandra felt her jaw drop. "Err ...you mean – everything?"

"Well, I'm soaked to my skin", explained Jonathan in a calm voice. "and I'm pretty sure you are too.. and besides, I'm getting cold!"

What was Jonathan thinking? Were they going to sit here, naked, in this dark cabin? Jonathan's blue eyes started to sparkle and Alexandra wasn't sure how to interpret his gaze. But he was right. They were really wet, even compared to their condition when they were standing under the roofed bench. Their clothes were covered with mud and the cold had seeped into every limb of their bodies.

"I just can't believe there's not at least some blankets here", said Jonathan in an analytical voice. "And we'll also need a fire to warm up."

As he finished his sentence, Jonathan walked across the room to peer into the corners. He found an additional storage room and there he finally found some dry blankets and towels. Meanwhile Alexandra got on her feet again and tried to fire up the oven with some pieces of wood she'd found next to it. Her ankle throbbed badly but she tried not to show anything. Jonathan returned with the towels and the blankets and told Alexandra about the storage room.

"Do you want to change in there?", he asked and looked at Alexandra. "I'll change here and then I will take care of the fire".


	7. Alexandra

**Chapter 7 (Alexandra)**

Alexandra didn't know why, but now she felt uncomfortable, all alone in the cabin with Jonathan.

Just a few moments ago, she had wanted to feel him, wanted to kiss him, and now she just wanted to be somewhere else – whatever, wherever but not here with him. Alexandra grabbed some of the blankets and towels and crossed over to the room to change, without saying anything.

She took off her clothes very slowly and wiped the water off her body. Maybe she just wanted to play for time, to not finish too soon and find Jonathan in an embarrassing situation.

Alexandra noticed a few scratches on her arm. It must have happened when she tumbled into the mud. She heard a rattling noise, like metal and glass, in the background. That had to be Jonathan, who was continuing to fire up the oven. Alexandra looked down at her body.

Physically, she just looked like a typical 16 year-old girl, maybe even more mature. Her skin glimmered in the light of the oil lamp. Alexandra covered herself with a towel and a blanket – and she just caught her thought of seeing Jonathan naked.

She knew, he was, compared to her other classmates, a skinny boy, but she imagined his body was similar to his face: with fine but also, striking features. He seemed to be small and thin, but strong at the same time. His steel-blue eyes, in whose depths she had been lost many times, his thick black hair, that always fell into his face and made him look older and wiser than he really was at 17 years. Now that he wasn't wearing his glasses, this impression became stronger.

Alexandra remembered the smell of his after-shave when he had held her firmly in his arms. He never admitted it, but Alexandra knew he shaved frequently. Jonathan had always declared that his beard would be just 'fluff' but Alexandra knew better.

She remembered the light scratching on her skin when Jonathan had kissed her and this thought about him excited her. His full mouth, his lips, so soft on her own. His tongue – softly exploring, almost polite, gentleman-like, but also seeking, demanding, demanding more...his kisses on her mouth, on her throat, on her hands, on her cheeks, his body next to hers, his heavy breath, his soft moan when he kissed her … she wanted more from him, she wanted so much more. She wanted to touch him, all over his body, she wanted to caress him, kiss him.

She wanted to feel Jonathan close to her, she wanted to feel him inside of her..


	8. The Clothing

**Chapter 8 (The Clothing)**

"Alex, is everything okay?"

Jonathan's words tore Alexandra out of her thoughts; she started.

"Ye .. yeah, everything's okay..", she responded in a trembling voice and she felt herself getting cold.

Alexandra wasn't sure anymore if it was because of the temperature in the cabin or because it was what she had just been thinking about.

She grabbed her wet clothes and limped back, to the other side of the room. Her hurting ankle was a sign for Alexandra that she was back in _reality'_ again. As she had assumed, Jonathan had already changed, too.

He had also converted the hammock into a clothesline and tabbed it so that it wasn't strung across the room anymore. All his clothes, including his underwear, were hanging on the hammock now.

_Well, then we both have the same starting position',_ Alexandra thought to herself, as she imagined Jonathan, as naked as she was under her covering blanket. He had also covered his upper body with a blanket. Alexandra supposed he was getting cold, too – or he just didn't want to _show' _himself to her.

This was also a characteristic that separated him from other men or, well, let's say: boys.

During summer he didn't put on a show by running around shirtless, while the girls were sweating their brains out in their T-shirts and blouses during class. After several exhortations by the teachers, the other boys also sat in class wearing a shirt or something, but this always changed during the big break or when school was over.

Jonathan didn't. Alexandra often had the feeling that he wanted to say by his behaviour, something like _a sorrow shared is but half a trouble'_; although she knew that strictly speaking, this thought was complete nonsense.

Secretly, Alexandra wanted to see more of Jonathan, but for now, she appreciated his behaviour, even it was for a different reason – and she loved him for that.

Yes, she really loved him, no matter how strange he was. She wanted to tell him, she would tell him, she _had_ to tell him – before maybe there wasn't any chance of telling him…


	9. Jonathan

**Chapter 9 (Jonathan)**

Jonathan's words snapped Alexandra out of her thoughts again.

"I found some tea-bags here - I hope you like tea."

Jonathan pointed to a pot and two metal-cups standing on the oven, a light smile on his face. The fire in the oven burned bright and warm and the room was starting to warm up. And to make things even better, Jonathan had found some pillows and had arranged them neatly for them to sit upon and to lie down, using the pillows and other towels and blankets.

_Oh my, he's such a sweetie. He's so worried about everything here and he's doing his best to make everything as comfortable as possible and I don't have anything better to do than to think about fucking him!'_

Alexandra felt ashamed of this thought, though, of course, she didn't tell Jonathan.

"Thank you.", she murmured softly. "Thank you for everything - that's so sweet of you."

Jonathan poured the tea into the cups and Alexandra started to hang up her clothes.

Hoping she wouldn't notice, Jonathan stole a glance at her, trying to see what pieces of her clothing she was placing on the hammock. A mix of joy and anxiety rose inside him as he watched Alexandra hanging up her underwear, too.

During their _changing time' _Jonathan had been lost in his thoughts and he had managed to put himself in a position to glance at Alexandra, undressing and wiping out the water from her body. At the same time he had pretended to prepare something by making the right noises.

The thought of having her hear those sounds and feel unobserved had excited him very much. The look of her body, her glimmering skin and her firm breasts excited him even more and when one of the metal-cups had almost slipped out of Jonathan's hands to hit the oven with a loud crash, Jonathan realized he had to stop observing Alexandra immediately and get these thoughts out of his mind.

Difficult as it would be, he had to do – if he didn't want Alexandra to see his excitation – and she _would_ see it, no doubt about it.

He was one of the skinniest guys in his class – but after sports class when everybody was taking a shower, Jonathan had noticed that, in comparison to his classmates, his private parts were built pretty well. Jonathan didn't know if he should appreciate this or not. He also didn't know, if this would help him at all with what could occur later this day. He had never slept with a girl before. All his knowledge about sex - he got it all from books. He had also learned from a book how strongly the self-confidence of growing boys and adult men was connected with the length of their penis. Jonathan had always looked at that in an analytical and rational way before. But should there be something true about this, even _he _would have a reason to be proud.

_Scarecrow, Scarecrow, you Freak! – Yeah, I might be a Freak, but I already have a bigger cock than most of you!'_

Jonathan tried to get rid of this thought as fast as possible to avoid an embarrassing situation with Alexandra.

Outside, the storm still raged. Alexandra helped Jonathan with the tea and they both took a seat on the makeshift bed. If the storm should continue, they probably would be stuck the night in this cabin.

But it wasn't uncomfortable at all. The wood in the oven crackled lightly, and it was warm and dry in the cabin. The tea did more than its share. Alexandra and Jonathan leaned against the cabin wall, relaxed and although Alexandra still felt a bit strange to be _trapped'_ here with Jonathan due to the circumstances, she was happy to be with him here.

The joy increased because Alexandra had the impression that Jonathan was feeling the same.


	10. Europe

**Chapter 10 (Europe)**

Neither knew what time it was.

They made themselves comfortable on the bed and started to talk about everything while the storm outside kept on raging. They especially talked about the political situation in Europe. Of course, there was a lot of stuff going on in Gotham to worry about, but at least to Alexandra, those things had receded into a distant memory.

There had been an altercation within the European Union and now it looked like the union was about to break in two. Alexandra's father had tried a lot of times to explain what was going on to her, but she didn't understand everything - she even didn't want to. The only thing she knew was that Germany and France had made an agreement, that the United States had stepped into the whole conflict and that Germany and France weren't willing to fulfil the US' demands nor support them in their _intervention into Inner European matters_'. Now for a few weeks, the whole situation had been very tense. Alexandra's father tried not to show concern and to play the whole thing down, but his facial expressions often spoke another language. Of course, he was a diplomat and due to his role he had some special privileges and diplomatic immunity, and as did his wife and his two children – but what would happen in case of a war? What would happen to them?

Alexandra didn't know how to behave. She tried to live her life as she usually did: she went to school, she hung out with her friends, she hung out with Jonathan – but the political situation had left its mark on her. Jonathan could sense how worried she was about it and tried to help her, to console her and to support her as much as possible.

"Don't worry.", he always said. "I'm sure everything will be okay soon." But he had to confess to himself that he could be wrong and that he just said this to calm himself down. Every time he thought about being separated from Alexandra, he shuddered – especially now, after having discovered feelings for her, so new and exciting. He had never felt so strongly about another person. He knew he loved her and he knew he didn't want to lose her.

_Could this thing in Europe pass by, just like this storm? Could they just stay in this cabin and wait until everything was over!'_

Jonathan imagined the cabin like a fortress, him and Alexandra against the rest of the world.

_They couldn't find us here, they couldn't harm us here.'_

Alexandra pressed Jonathan's hand and cuddled into his arms. They closed their eyes… and fell asleep.


	11. The secret wish

**Chapter 11 (The secret wish)**

Alexandra started awake as Jonathan rubbed his eyes.

Was it still Saturday? How long had they been here now? Jonathan rose up to gaze out through one of the shutters. It was still stormy outside and Jonathan couldn't see a lot. The sun had already set and nightfall was about to come. Jonathan knelt next to the books he had placed down to dry - he had also put his watch and Alexandra's cell- phone there. In this, they fit perfectly: Alexandra didn't use a watch, Jonathan had no cell-phone. Though right now, both items didn't seem to be serving anything.

"My watch has stopped", said Jonathan. "It's stuck at 3:30 p.m. but who knows, how long ago that was! It's getting dark outside now."

"And my cell-phone?", Alexandra asked.

Jonathan put the watch aside and grabbed Alexandra's cell-phone. There wasn't anything on the display.

"Maybe the phone is switched off?", Alexandra asked and Jonathan tried to switch it on.

"Hmm.. either the battery's too weak or the cell-phone is just broken..", Jonathan said in a dry voice and put the phone aside.

"Oh great!", Alexandra hissed with anger, although she didn't know why she was angry.

There was no reason for it. No doubt her parents and Jonathan's mother would be worried about the two of them, but it was safer to stay here in the cabin than brave the storm outside. Secretly she hoped that her parents would have the same thought and wouldn't worry that much.

Jonathan had returned to the rest and took a seat next to her. Both leaned with their upper bodies against the cabin's wall, the blankets still around their shoulders, although it was very warm in the cabin now and they were starting to sweat. Jonathan's hair was dry now, and was falling into his face - just as Alexandra knew it did, and loved. Jonathan placed his arm around her again. The blanket around his shoulders slipped a bit and his naked chest came to light. Alexandra was expecting Jonathan to put the blanket back where it had been, but he didn't move. Alexandra noticed now that a big towel was wrapped around his hips. She hadn't noticed it before because of the blanket.

Jonathan's skin was impeccable. Jonathan was as Alexandra had imagined: he was skinny, but at the same time he seemed very wiry and to her, even athletic in a way. Alexandra noticed the contours of his muscles. She liked Jonathan, how he was built. It just suited him and she couldn't imagine him being any another way.

Alexandra noticed a light sprinkling of fluff on Jonathan's chest. It was very fine _but'_ Alexandra believed _this is just the beginning'._The thought of Jonathan having a '_well-haired_' chest when he was older pleased her and even excited her.

Alexandra took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She breathed deeply again and inhaled the scent of Jonathan's body. His scent was bewitching, even intoxicating and suddenly Alexandra was overcome by the need to crush Jonathan, to bend down, to touch him and to cover him with kisses, start with his face, then over his throat, his chest, his hard nipples, his abdomen, down to his loins, there, where she would loosen his towel, and his manhood would stretch out to her, waiting desirously to be caressed by her with her mouth and hand.


	12. The ankle

**Chapter 12 (The ankle)**

"How is your ankle?", she heard asking Jonathan and Alexandra snapped out of her thoughts.

Again he had caught her in the act. Was it just pure chance or did Jonathan suspect what she had been thinking about the whole time? Or was he also thinking about the same thing?

"What?", Alexandra responded, lifting her head off Jonathan's chest, slightly disoriented by her position - she'd been somewhere else entirely…

"Your ankle. I'd like to check your ankle", said Jonathan and leaned forward to stand up.

Alexandra sat up, her upper body leaning against the wall again. She also removed the blanket and her arms and shoulders came into light. Her skin was gleaming. Jonathan was standing in front of her, waiting for her to get comfortable. He noticed she wore a big towel too, which covered her body from her breast down to her knees. Jonathan knelt down slowly, keeping an eye on Alexandra all the time. His eyes looked at her covered body and right this moment he was longing to open the knot of her towel so that her beautiful body, her firm breasts could come to light.

Alexandra felt Jonathan's gaze on her, his piercing blue eyes, almost hypnotizing her. To her it was as if he was undressing her with his gaze and she felt herself getting hot down there, down in her magical triangle'. Alexandra stretched out her legs and pressed them together, hoping Jonathan wouldn't notice what was happening to her. He touched her right knee and started to move his hand over her lower leg down to her ankle. He felt Alexandra's body tense under his touch and her breath getting faster.

"Don't worry", he whispered. "I won't hurt you." Jonathan smiled lightly.

"I know..", Alexandra said softly and relaxed again but she noticed her nervousness.

Jonathan raised her leg a bit and started to examine her ankle. He tried to stay calm, but his hands were trembling. He touched her ankle very carefully and started to move the joint into different directions.

"Does this hurt?", Jonathan asked as he flexed her ankle, observing Alexandra's facial expression.

He stopped when he saw her grimace of pain and lowered her leg very carefully.

"You have sprained your ankle", Jonathan said, trying to gently place Alexandra's leg in its former position, on the floor. "I don't think anything's broken, though."

Alexandra heaved a sigh of relief, but not for the reason Jonathan was assuming. The pain had dazed her out of her sexual agitation for a short spell, but it hadn't gone away.

"You would make a good doctor.", Alexandra said with a light smile. Jonathan responded with a smile, too. But then his smile disappeared.

His steel-blue eyes gazed at her and Alexandra felt a shiver running down her back.

It wasn't a disgruntled gaze – it was more a look of sadness, of longing, it was a look of desire. Then Alexandra felt Jonathan touching her ankles with his hands, starting to caress them very gently. His fingertips barely touched her skin, but his every touch was electrifying. She felt his hands rising in circular movements, starting from her ankles over her shinbones up to her knees. The whole time Jonathan gazed into Alexandra's eyes, expecting her to stop him, but she didn't – she even didn't try to. She could hear his heavy breathing. She couldn't see it but she knew how agitated Jonathan was and how they both were fighting hard to not lose control.

But she _wanted_ to lose control, she wanted Jonathan with every fibre of her body, her heart and her soul.


	13. The agitation

**Chapter 13 (The agitation)**

Jonathan's body trembled. His hands were still on Alexandra's knees and he was about to pull them away again.

"Don't !", Alexandra whispered and Jonathan paused in his movement.

Without saying anything he watched Alexandra draw up her legs and open her thighs. A wave of agitation ran through his body. He didn't know if this was really happening or if he was just dreaming. His penis hardened and he could feel the blood pulsing from shaft to tip. Jonathan felt it so strongly it almost hurt. His whole body hurt and he was trembling – and he knew the reason was Alexandra. Every pore, every muscle, every fibre of his body yearned for her. Jonathan didn't know what was happening – it was all so intoxicating and there was nothing else – just this moment. There were only them – her hearts, her bodies, her souls – and their desire to become one.

Jonathan didn't take off his hands of Alexandra's legs as he knelt down between them.

Alexandra's towel had glided down and Jonathan could see her private parts stretching out to him, trembling and lustful. Jonathan moaned softly and swallowed heavily. Although his towel hadn't slipped, Alexandra could now see his huge erection. What was he going to do now? Would Jonathan pull her towards him, loosen his towel and enter her breathing heavily, without saying anything? Would he start to kiss her thighs, moving slowly to the center of her lust to rest his head between her thighs and then to explore her, licking and kissing? It didn't matter what happened now, she just wanted it. She wanted to do everything she had been longing for, with him.

Jonathan glanced at her, unsure of what to do. Before Alexandra could say anything, Jonathan grabbed her hips and started to pull her softly until her upper body was lying flat on the pillows of their rest. So did he really want what Alexandra was thinking of, too? Jonathan placed his hand around Alexandra's neck, helping her to sit up. Both were now sitting face to face, gazing into each others eyes.

Jonathan touched Alexandra's face and started to kiss her, on her lips, on her throat. She closed her eyes and he covered her eyelids with kisses. He was searching her lips over and over again, his tongue – again softly exploring, gentleman-like, but also demanding, demanding more...

Jonathan's hands moved over her face, her throat, her shoulders, her arms. They moved over her back to her breast. Alexandra felt Jonathan starting to loosen the knot of her towel. He pulled it away from her and let it fall to the side. Now Alexandra was sitting completely naked in front of Jonathan and for a brief moment she felt uncomfortable. Jonathan noticed it and started to kiss her again, holding her close with one hand and caressing her breast with the other. Then he started to caress her with his lips and his tongue. The tip of his tongue circled round her hardened nipples and Alexandra gave a loud moan when Jonathan started to bite them lightly.

How did he know all this, how did he know what to do, if he had never done it before?

_What are you doing to me?',_ she wanted to ask him, but he gazed into her eyes as if to say _I know all this from books - only'_. Jonathan was a good student – and obviously not only at School.

He took her hand, leading it to his towel around his hips. Alexandra's hand started to tremble as she loosened the knot and pulled the towel away. She was really surprised by his manhood. She hadn't expected a thin skinny guy like Jonathan to be this well equipped.

He noticed her pleased expression on her face – yes, she was surprised and she seemed to like the view.


	14. Love

**Chapter 14 (Love)**

It was very warm in the cabin now; the fire in the oven and the fire between the two lovers were doing their part.

Beads of perspiration were running down Jonathan's chest to his abdomen, gleaming in the light. Alexandra started to kiss him again and caressed his chest and his nipples, first with her hands, then with her lips and her tongue. Jonathan answered with a deep moan. Her hand passed down over his abdomen to his penis and slowly, she began to massage it.  
Jonathan groaned out loud and closed his eyes. Alexandra felt his embrace get tighter, he was really clinging to her now.

"Alex..", Jonathan whispered, his voice trembling, "I don't know what to do. I can't stand this for much longer..."

Alexandra took her hand away from Jonathan's penis, placing it on his hips. She started to kiss him again.

"I want you, I want you so much .. ", he whispered between the kisses, ".. but you gotta help me, I don't know how to..."

"Shhhh ..", Alexandra said softly, putting a finger to his lips "..everything's okay.."

Alexandra pulled Jonathan onto the pillows of their rest and he held her tight as they both lay down gently. They were kissing each other over and over again. Jonathan was lying between Alexandra's thighs, not really sure how to go any further. Of course he knew what would happen next, but he didn't quite know how to "do" it.

Jonathan was getting nervous. Up until now everything had been going so well, he believed he knew how to do it all right, and now he was afraid he was going to fail! Alexandra could feel his fear and she kissed him.

"Everything's gonna be okay..", she whispered and as Jonathan propped himself on his hands, Alexandra helped him to bring his manhood to the place where it was expected.. and both groaned aloud when Jonathan entered her.

Suddenly she noticed a strange expression on Jonathan's face.

Now he looked like a little boy standing in a store full of toys, undecided which toy would be the first one to play with. He was overwhelmed by his feelings and he didn't know how to integrate them. His gaze started to move around and his body was trembling. Yes, he was inside her, he felt her legs around him, he saw her firm naked breasts, he felt his manhood embraced by her warm soft body.

_Oh my God!', _Jonathan thought _She.. she is so wet..'_

It felt so wonderful! But was it right? Maybe he was doing something wrong and this wasn't usually supposed to happen. Alexandra caressed Jonathan's back, whispering into his ear, "Don't be afraid, everything's okay..". She tried to move and placed her hands on Jonathan's hips and buttocks. He felt a light pressure on them, then it disappeared and then again, he felt the pressure again.

It was Alexandra, trying to lead him with her hands. He followed and tried to move together with her. At the beginning it was difficult for him. He didn't dare look at Alexandra because he was convinced he had disappointed her. He felt his face burn and tears were filling his eyes. But then he heard Alexandra's voice, whispering, "Everything's okay.." over and over again. He could feel her caressing him, he felt her kisses, on his cheek, on his neck, although he still wasn't looking at her. Jonathan could hear her soft moan and he felt her hot breath on his skin.

They were moving more and more together, in a rhythm and suddenly Jonathan didn't feel the pressure of her hands anymore, on his hips and his buttocks. Alexandra didn't need to guide him anymore.

Jonathan closed his eyes and started to kiss Alexandra and embraced her firmly. In between, he gazed directly into her eyes. Alexandra watched him fighting his tears, but she knew this time, they weren't tears of sadness but tears of lust. Jonathan's thrusts, soft and short at the beginning, were now getting deeper and more passionate. Alexandra enjoyed every single thrust, she felt his hardened manhood pressing forward, deeper and deeper into her body and with every thrust, her lust got stronger.

'_Oh, she loved it, how he fucked her!'_

Alexandra bit on her lips, trying not to scream out loud. Her breath was getting faster and heavy and her hands clutched at Jonathan's back.

"Oh, Jonathan, please don't stop..." she moaned, closing her eyes. Jonathan entered her deeper and stronger and with every thrust, he groaned aloud.

_Oh my God, I can't stand it much longer!',_ Alexandra thought.

Jonathan didn't know how mad with lust those groans in his deep voice were driving her! He started to kiss her and was whispering her name over and over again.

He gazed deep into her eyes and suddenly everything started to fade. Alexandra was no longer the young girl, that he had known for the last 4 years; now she was someone so intimate, like he'd known her for a long, long time, like decades, maybe centuries or thousands of years, maybe even from a former life.

"My goddess ..", Jonathan whispered and then their bodies exploded from the inside and a powerful wave of feelings, excitation and lust ran through the two lovers. Both groaned out loud and held each other tightly, as they came together and Jonathan poured into her.

For a long time, neither moved.

Jonathan was still inside her. He couldn't move at all. His body felt like a heavy stone and he was trembling. He looked at Alexandra. She saw him crying. Jonathan could feel the hot tears on his face and he didn't know if he was happy or sad. Touched by his emotion, Alexandra slowly kissed the tears off his face. She had never seen Jonathan this emotional before. Both were dripping with sweat and still out of breath. Alexandra caressed Jonathan's face.

"You're trembling .. Jonathan Thomas Crane.", she whispered.

Jonathan smiled. It was the first time Alexandra had called him by his middle name.

"Don't worry.. I'm okay...", he said in a soft voice and kissed Alexandra.

Jonathan placed his head on her breast, making that he wasn't crushing her with his weight. She caressed his hair and kissed his forehead, soaked in sweat. Both closed their eyes and for a moment they remembered what they had just been through together.


	15. The confession

**Chapter 15 (The confession)**

The storm was still raging outside, but now, it had started to weaken.

The night was dark and the wood in the oven crackled lightly. Alexandra and Jonathan had fallen into a deep sleep, still holding each other, exhausted by their act of love.

Now Jonathan got up to put more wood into the oven and to prepare some tea. Alexandra had turned onto her side and when she noticed Jonathan was awake, she raised her head and for a while, gazed at Jonathan without saying anything, supporting her head with her hand. She was observing him, preparing the tea and looking for something in the shelf.

He was still naked, his skin gleaming in the soft light of the oil lamp. How beautiful he was! Alexandra felt a shiver run down her back. By now, Jonathan had noticed Alexandra gazing at him and he smiled lightly. He pulled a small package off a shelf, poured water on the tea, placed it all aside and walked back towards Alexandra. He lay down next to her and bent over her. She embraced Jonathan and he kissed her softly.

"I've found some cookies in the shelf.", he said in a low voice. He was hungry and so was Alexandra. "I'm sorry, but it was the only thing I could find here…"

"Don't worry...", she responded softly and ran her hand through Jonathan's thick black hair.

They gazed into each other's eyes.

"It was so wonderful with you, Alex.. I still can't believe all this really happened.."

"I feel the same way..", Alexandra whispered and smiled. So did Jonathan. She could feel her heart beating faster.

"I love you, Jonathan. I want you to know that.. whatever happens.. I love you."

Alexandra's words burned themselves into Jonathan's soul and into his heart. At this moment, there wasn't anything more wonderful in this world but to hear this from her. And he wanted her to know how he felt, too.

He was fighting his tears as he confessed his love.

Jonathan had once heard the words Having the good fortune of loving someone so much as you only have once in your life'. He had always thought he'd been at a disadvantage - he had never felt loved, like this and he hadn't believed he would ever be. Jonathan also didn't think he himself was capable of feeling this way, of loving another person, a girl, a woman – until now…

Having the good fortune of loving someone so much as you only have once in your life' - to Jonathan, this good fortune was now his and the person he loved so much was Alexandra.


	16. The way home

**Chapter 16 (The way home)**

A new day dawned. Jonathan and Alexandra got up and got dressed.

Last night they had made love again, even more passionate and more intense than their first time and early this morning after waking up, they had made love again. With each time, the familiarity and passion between them had grown, and their fears and insecurities made no difference anymore.

Both realized that from this day on, everything would change for them; nothing would ever be the same: not the lake, not the forest, not this cabin, Gotham, the light … NOTHING would ever be the same. Jonathan and Alexandra didn't know what the future held for them, but they promised each other that they would only be together now.

The sun was shining bright when Jonathan and Alexandra finally opened the cabin door. The storm had passed by. Leaves and bushes were lying all over around, some boughs were bent over, a tree near the cabin had toppled over. What a miracle that the cabin hadn't been damaged!

They put everything back in order, leaving everything in the cabin as it had been before and packed up their books, the blankets and the towels into a sea-bag they had found in the cabin. They agreed to launder the used stuff and bring it back. As their watch and cell-phone weren't working anymore, Jonathan and Alexandra only could guess what the time was. It was possibly noon already and their parents had to be sick worrying about them. Jonathan closed the door, kissed Alexandra and then they started to head home to the Wentzler's house, to Alexandra's house.

On their way home Jonathan and Alexandra wondered how to tell their parents they were a couple now. How would they react? Probably they would not understand how serious the two of them were. They were both very young, no doubt, but _Having the good fortune of loving someone as much as you only have once in your life'_ was Jonathan's comment – their age wouldn't make a difference.

They passed by a small glade and then crossed the small footbridge leading to Alexandra's home. From there, they could already see her house. Both stopped and Alexandra gazed at Jonathan. She was nervous now. Jonathan touched her hand and held it firmly.

"We will make it..", he whispered. Alexandra sighed and kissed him. She looked again towards the house, gripped Jonathan's hand and said in a firm voice:  
"Well then.. attack!" Jonathan smiled and they started moving again.

"You know,", Jonathan said, "maybe it won't get so bad at all, I mean…"

Suddenly he noticed that Alexandra wasn't listening to him. She had stopped and was staring at the house. It was as if she had seen a ghost.

"What's wrong?", Jonathan asked, annoyed, but Alexandra didn't respond.

Then he looked over at the house too and saw Alexandra's family at the entrance. He noticed two black cars and three men and a woman. From their outfits they seemed to be Government officials. Alexandra's father was arguing with the woman and gesticulating wildly. Jonathan heard him talking in German. Two of the men went into the house, returning with suitcases, bags and other items. They put them in the trunks of the waiting cars and returned to the house to come out again with things to pack. Alexandra's little brother Martin was sitting on the veranda with a teddy bear in his hand. His eyes were red and he seemed to have been crying. The third man was standing next to him, Alexandra's mother between them, arguing with the man. She was trying to get him away from Martin. He looked like he was about to grab the boy and put him in the car. Jonathan and Alexandra glanced at each other and then walked over to the house. At first, nobody noticed them approaching.

"Papa, Mama!", Alexandra shouted in German. "What's going on here?"

The adults stopped arguing immediately and turned to look at them.

"My God, Alexandra! Jonathan!", her father yelled and ran towards them. "Where, in heavens name, have you been! We have been going crazy worrying about you!"

He was talking in English, because he knew Jonathan wouldn't understand German. Alexandra's mother was walking down from the veranda with Martin.

"Jonathan's mom has been calling for hours! Where have you two been?", she shouted and touched Alexandra on the shoulder.

She noticed her daughter was holding Jonathan's hand, but she didn't say anything.

"We were in the small cabin at the edge of the forest, near the lake", Jonathan explained. "The storm got very bad and Alexandra's cellular phone wasn't working. We had no choice but to wait until the storm was over."

"I'm sorry, we didn't want to worry you, but it would have been too dangerous..", Alexandra started but her father interrupted her.

"It's okay, dear. You both did the right thing."

His worried, even disgruntled, look disappeared and everybody sighed in relief, but then her parents' faces darkened again.


	17. War !

**Chapter 17 (War !)**

"Mama, Papa, something serious has happened...", Alexandra said, looking nervously first at Jonathan then at her parents.

"Alexandra, my child.. ", her father interrupted her, touching her arm.

He knew what their daughter was about to tell them, but this, what he had to tell her now, would be so horrible for her and Jonathan, that he felt like his heart was being ripped to pieces.

"Alexandra, Jonathan ...", her father said in a sad, heavy voice. "Last night, the USA declared war on France and Germany."

"What?", Alexandra whispered in a trembling voice, as she felt her knees gave way.

Tears were filling up her eyes. Jonathan, holding the sea-bag in his other hand, let it fall abruptly, to put his arm around and support Alexandra, because she swayed and looked as if she was about to lose her balance. He was completely shocked, unsure if he had really understood Alexandra's father even though he was speaking English.

"These people are from the German embassy and the US Government", her mother added softly, pointing to the strangers standing next to the cars, watching the whole scene silently.

The woman stepped forward, to face the family.

"My name is Tania Müller-O'Brian", she said. "I work for the German embassy. We will first escort you to the embassy and from there you will be taken to Gotham airport to catch the next flight back to Frankfurt."

"No, no!", Alexandra shouted, shaking her head in bewilderment.

Tears were now running down her face and she grabbed her father's sleeve.

"Tell me, that's not true! Please tell me, that's not true!"

"My child, I'm so sorry...", he said, his own voice choking with tears, looking at Alexandra and Jonathan. "..for you both".

One of the men approached.

"I'm sorry, Mrs. Wentzler, but we have to leave now."

With these words, he took her elbow and started to escort her in the direction of the first car. She didn't resist and followed him, holding little Martin's hand. The boy had started to cry again and his mother picked him up in her arms, trying to calm and console him.

Now Mrs. Müller-O'Brian approached Alexandra's father: "Mr. Wentzler, please follow me."

She guided him to the car and he too, followed her without resistance. Alexandra couldn't let go of Jonathan's hand. Now one of the two men, a tall, beefy guy, approached Alexandra and Jonathan. Both were standing there, holding each other in their arms, motionless, apathetic and unable to understand what was going on, unable to react. Tears were pouring down Jonathan's face too, as he tried to hold on to Alexandra as firmly as he could.

"Jonathan..", Alexandra whispered, gazing at him, when the man broke their embrace, pulling Alexandra to the car.

For a short moment, Jonathan looked at them without moving.

"Hey! What are you doing?", he suddenly yelled, running after Alexandra and the man as they had almost reached the car. "Let the girl go!"

He grabbed the beefy guy from behind and tried to pull him away from Alexandra. Suddenly, he was struggling with the beefy guy as Alexandra tried to break them up. The other man ran quickly towards them, trying to pull Jonathan off his colleague who was pulling and punching Beefy like a madman, trying, with all his strength, to pull him away from Alexandra.

"You are not allowed to do this! She was born here, you don't have the right to exile her!"

"Boy, calm down now, there is nothing you can do about it!", the man shouted, grabbing Jonathan by his shoulders.

"Damn it! Leave me alone!", Jonathan yelled, his voice choked with tears.

Now the beefy man grabbed Jonathan firmly and his colleague grabbed Alexandra. Then Beefy pushed Jonathan back. Jonathan tried to run towards Alexandra, but Beefy grabbed him again and gave him a blow on his stomach. Jonathan groaned out loud, doubled over and collapsed to the ground. Tania Müller-O'Brian screamed.

"Stop it, God damn you, he's still a child!", Mr. Wentzler yelled at the bully, watching in bewilderment.

Jonathan gasped and still didn't move, holding his stomach. Then he looked at the man who had punched him, his eyes full of rage. He wanted to stand up again, to punch back, but Beefy grabbed Jonathan again and twisted his arm. Jonathan cried out in pain.

"Leave him alone, you're hurting him!", Alexandra yelled and broke away from the other man. Before he could even react, Alexandra had already rushed to Jonathan and Beefy. She threw herself between them, trying to separate them.

"Please!", she shouted looking at the man. "Give me just a few moments with him, I am begging you!"

Beefy let off them and straightened up.

"I beg you! I will go with you, but please, first give my boyfriend and me a few minutes! Please!"

He nodded.

"All right.", he said, adjusted his suit and went back to the rear car.


	18. Farewell

**Chapter 18 (Farewell)**

Jonathan was lying on the ground, curled up, coughing and panting, holding his aching arm.

"Jonathan, Jonathan!", Alexandra shouted, knelt down next to him, trying to help him up.

Jonathan straightened up slowly. His face was flushed and was wet from his tears. Despairingly, he gazed at Alexandra, but as he noticed the two men in the background, his eyes blazed with anger and Jonathan tried to push her away and attack the men again. The beefy man stepped forward.

"No, Jonathan, please, don't!", Alexandra yelled, holding him back with all her strength.

He fell back on to his knees, struggling as Alexandra gently touched his face.

"Jonathan, please, listen to me!", she shouted. "You have to calm down! You are not helping me like this!"

Jonathan stopped struggling.

"Alexandra!", he sobbed and she started to cry again. "We have to do something. We can't just let this happen…"

"My love, now will you just listen to me, very carefully, okay?", Alexandra said in a trembling voice, looking into Jonathan's eyes.

"Now you need to be brave, okay? You need to be strong for the both of us, do you hear me?"

"No, no I don't!", Jonathan cried, shaking his head, but Alexandra held him firmly.

"Yes, you will! You will fight and you will brave! Just as I will be brave and strong for the both of us. Just as I will fight. We'll do this together, do you hear me, Jonathan?"

Alexandra was expecting his answer, but he hesitated.

She looked into his eyes, now hissing:  
"Did you HEAR me?"

"Yes.. yes..", he whispered.

Alexandra's heart felt like it was being ripped to shreds when she looked at him, looking so broken. She didn't want to go, she didn't want to leave Jonathan, but she knew that her fate was now sealed.

Alexandra opened the clasp of the chain around her neck, holding an amulet. It had been a gift from her grandma. The necklace was very precious to Alexandra and she had worn it everyday, day and night, and last night too, as Jonathan and she had made love. Alexandra opened Jonathan's hand, placed the necklace into his palm and closed his hand again.

"Keep this for me...", she said softly.

"Alex ..", Jonathan whispered, then he pulled her towards him.

They embraced and kissed, one last time, clutching each other desperately.

"I love you..", Jonathan sobbed, kissing Alexandra's hand. "Don't forget this..."

The beefy man was approaching them again and now touched Alexandra at her shoulder.

"Having the good fortune of loving someone as much as you only have once in your life", she whispered and with these words she slipped out of Jonathan's arms, straightened up and followed Beefy without resistance to the last car, looking back at Jonathan all the time.

Alexandra's family was in the front car already; her mother and her brother crying, not in any condition to watch what was happening outside. Alexandra's father was sitting on his seat, crying and broken that he couldn't help his daughter. Beefy opened the door and Alexandra got into the car, without once taking away her eyes off Jonathan. Beefy now slammed the door and got into the front of the car. Jonathan was still on his knees and cried out, looking at the last car. The engines started and the cars started to move. Alexandra turned around to look at Jonathan, pressing her hand against the rear window. For a moment Jonathan just stared at her.

"Alex! ...Alex!", he yelled, awakening out of his lethargy, struggled to his feet and started running after the cars.

The cars kept speeding up and as he suddenly realized he would never catch up, Jonathan stopped. In a few moments, the cars disappeared on the horizon.

"Nooooo!" Jonathan screamed, fell on to his knees and cried bitterly, Alexandra's gift of love in his hands.


	19. Despair

**Chapter 19 (Despair)**

It took a while for Jonathan to stop crying and start thinking straight.

He had been crouching on the stony ground in front of the Wentzler's house all along, crying and screaming. He was clutching Alexandra's necklace so firmly in his hands that his knuckles had gone white. He couldn't move at all. But he knew he had to do something, he couldn't stay here forever!

Jonathan managed to get on to his feet and ran to the Wentzler's house. The entrance door was locked, but Alexandra had shown him a few weeks ago where to find the hidden, spare key. With shaking hands, he opened the door, rushed in and picked up the phone to call his mother. In a voice still choked with tears, he told her what had happened.

"We got to go to the embassy!", he almost yelled into the phone.

"Jonathan...", his mother said, but Jonathan interrupted her with the words "I'll run up to you. We need to hurry!" and hung up the phone.

He rushed back to the main door and banged it shut behind him.

Jonathan knew the route his mother would take to get to the Wentzler's house. Still holding Alexandra's necklace in her hand, he started running. He ran as fast as he could. His body was trembling and his lungs burned, but for nothing in the world could he have stopped or even slowed down. Then he noticed the old Ford, his mother's car, coming round the corner, its wheels squeaking. Jonathan shouted out to his mother. She saw him and stopped the car. Jonathan ran over to her and jumped into the car.

"Go, Mom!", he shouted, panting, even before she could say anything.

It took about 20 minutes to drive to the embassy. On the way, Jonathan described to his mother what had happened, but his mother only could understand half of what he was telling her. She noticed his death grip on something in his hand. It looked like a necklace with an amulet. His hands were shaking as Jonathan opened the lock of the necklace to place it around his neck. Mrs. Crane talked incessantly, trying to calm him down, but Jonathan wasn't listening. He just stared out the window, watching the passing traffic.

The closer they got to the district where the embassy was, the heavier the traffic got. Jonathan was starting to get impatient and cursed out loud. Mrs. Crane looked at him, annoyed - she didn't like him cursing. Jonathan barked at her to driver faster even though he knew she couldn't because the traffic was so bad. Now the traffic had almost come to a standstill. Jonathan cranked down the window and gazed out. He noticed a crowd of people standing in front of a building. It was the German embassy. He heard the honking of the cars around them; some of the drivers were cursing over the din of the traffic.

"Damn it!", Jonathan shouted and opened the door.

"Jonathan, where are you going!", Mrs. Crane yelled – even though she knew where he wanted to go. "No, wait!"

But Jonathan wasn't listening as he slammed the door shut behind him and ran off, heading towards the embassy. He forced his way through the stopped cars, he even climbed up on the hoods, he bumped into people getting out of their cars, ignoring them as they yelled things like "Hey boy, are you crazy?" or "Get outta here!" at him. He just wanted to get to the embassy building as fast as he could.

Mrs. Crane parked her car in the middle of the lane, to follow Jonathan. She knew she would be obstructing the traffic, but she just wanted to find her son.


	20. The Embassy

**Chapter 20 (The Embassy)**

Jonathan finally reached the embassy.

The crowd of people in front of the embassy had grown. Some people were carrying placards and banners, other people were shouting things Jonathan didn't understand. A crowd of people was pushing against the gate, trying to force it open. A chain of police officers, standing in front of the gateway, tried to barricade the pushing crowds. Jonathan noticed patrol cars standing around and he started to force his way through the crowd, toward the gate. He heard the voices of the out-of-control crowd around him; he heard the police officers yelling at them, trying to push them back.

"Wentzler!", Jonathan yelled over and over again while forcing his way forward.

He yelled as loud as he could to drown out the crowd. Jonathan managed to reach the chain of the police officers.

"Wentzler!", he shouted again "I've got to see the Wentzler family!"

"No trespassing!", shouted one of the police officers. "Nobody comes in here!"

"Let me in! I've got to see them!"

"Boy, get outta here!", the officer yelled and right then, Jonathan was suddenly pushed by the crowd, right into the police officers.

The voices got louder and now a riot was breaking out. The policemen were fighting to hold the crowd back. Jonathan was pushed back and forth and after a few seconds, he was hurled forcefully against the tall steel fence encircling the embassy building. Jonathan was dazed for a moment. He touched his temple and felt something warm and wet on his fingers. He was bleeding. Someone had punched him in the head before he got hurled against the fence. Jonathan gripped it, the upset crowd around him.

_Oh my God! The necklace! Where is the necklace!' _

In a panic, Jonathan put his hand on his throat and his chest. But the necklace was in its place. In relief Jonathan gripped the amulet and looked out, at the main gate the entrance door of the embassy. Nobody was there.

Jonathan was about to turn around and try to force his way through the crowd again, heading towards the gate, when he noticed the entrance door had just opened and some people came out. He gripped the thick bars of the fence and just stared at the door. He saw men in dark suits coming out, policemen, then Mr. and Mrs. Wentzler, little Martin – and then it was her, Alexandra. Her face was pale, her eyes red from crying.

Jonathan gripped the fence as tight as he could and shouted Alexandra's name. At first she didn't seem to hear him. Again he shouted her name as loud as he could. Alexandra gazed in the direction of his voice this time – and there he was, Jonathan.

He couldn't hear her, but from her lips he realized she was saying his name. They just looked at each other. It was probably no more than a split second, but to them it was eternity. Jonathan started to try and climb up the fence. He tried several times, but the bars of the fence were too slippery and Jonathan just slid down. Alexandra tried to move towards him, but someone grabbed her shoulder. Again, two black cars drove up and the suited men and Alexandra and her family got in. She looked over at Jonathan, shouting his name over and over again.

"Alex... no!", he yelled, still gripping the bars and still trying to climb up.

"I love you..", he could hear Alexandra saying before getting into the car without resisting.

Jonathan saw the tears running down her face. For a moment he just watched the cars moving slowly, towards the gates, then he released his grip to force his way through the crowd again. He and the crowd had just been pushed back, when the gates opened and the policemen tried to clear a path. A riot broke out again, but Jonathan managed to get directly to the front of the gate. He hadn't realized his mother had found him in the crowd and was calling his name.

Jonathan was right at the front, as the cars passed through the doorway. The riot was getting uncontrollable and some people started to block the driveway, other people were hitting against the cars' windows. The policemen were trying to push the upset crowd away from the cars. The first car managed to get pass through, but the second one with Alexandra had come to a stop. Jonathan looked at her and forced his way up to the rear window. He tried to open the door, but it was locked. The crowd was slamming wildly against the car, the policemen had pulled out their truncheons and had started to beat up the crowd, trying to push the people back. Jonathan ducked, trying to avoid being hit. He looked Alexandra in the eye, still rattling on the door.

_If only I could rip out this goddamn door!'_.

Alexandra gave Jonathan a sad look, watching him struggle with the car door and punching the window. She pressed her hand against the window. Jonathan paused, looking at her, then he did the same with his hand and for a moment, their hands touched, although with the window glass between…

Both gazed into each others eyes.

"I love you..", Jonathan whispered, tears running down his face. He knew Alexandra couldn't hear him, but she knew what he was saying.

"I love you..", she whispered back.

Suddenly Jonathan was grabbed by a policeman, his hand yanked from the window as he was pushed back. The car's engine roared and the car started to move. The police officer let Jonathan go when he realized he didn't resist. Again Jonathan tried to force his way out through the crowd as far as he could. Almost stumbling, he watched the car turn into a side street, which had been blocked by 2 patrol cars.

"Jonathan!", he heard a voice shouting.

It was his mother. Jonathan, still crying, turned around, watching his mother running to him.

"My God, Jonathan!", she shouted, taking his face into her hands.

She saw his bleeding forehead and his tears.

"Mom! The airport! We've got to get to the airport! Right now!", Jonathan shouted, his voice choked.

"Jon..", said his mother in a soft voice, while Jonathan was frantically looking around.

The traffic was still stopped - it wasn't possible to move forward or backwards. The upset crowd was still protesting, and there were policemen and patrol cars everywhere.

"I'm so sorry, Jon..."

"Mom!", Jonathan started, but he couldn't go any further.

His tears poured as he cried bitterly. He knew his mother was right there was nothing more he could do.

Jonathan cried bitterly in his mother's arms.

Mrs. Crane hugged him tight, knowing that her son's heart was broken.


	21. Sorrow and Anger

**Chapter 21 (Sorrow and Anger)**

The next few days, weeks were a mental anguish for Jonathan.

In Gotham itself, things were "business as usual", but it was hard for Jonathan to concentrate on everyday life.

Mrs. Donovan, the headmistress of Gotham High School, had called Jonathan into her office, days after the beginning of war between the USA, Germany and France to inquire after his condition. Mrs. Donovan had asked Jonathan if there was anything she could do for him. She tried to support him, tried to explain to him, that this war would undoubtedly be over soon and Alexandra and her family would return to Gotham. But Jonathan couldn't, and didn't even want to believe that that would ever happen.

He pored over all newspapers in Gotham, every day and listened to the news on the radio, because he and his mother didn't have a TV. The only news he ever heard were bad. There had been fights in cities all over, in Germany and France. Berlin was half-destroyed, Köln and Wiesbaden had been cut off from outer world, Paris had just been bombed last night.  
Wiesbaden? Wiesbaden was the town Alexandra was from. Had she and her family returned there? Was she okay? Was she safe?

_If I only could contact her!'_

But where to start? All telephone lines were broken, there was a complete system breakdown in both countries in Europe. Even so – how could he possibly look for her from _here_? Without an address, without a phone number? Jonathan was despaired of ever knowing what had happened….

At Gotham High, everything went on as always – with the only difference that Jonathan was alone now. To him it was like wandering about in a fog, which was reflected in Jonathan's lost expression. He noticed the confused gazes of some of his class-mates when he entered a room. It was as if they were sorry for him, for him having lost his girlfriend. Elizabeth Perkins, one of his class-mates once said to him:

"I'm so sorry for you, for what happened, Jonathan."

Oh, she was sorry? As if she was so innocent! She was one of those, whispering behind his back and Alexandra's, teasing them, together with her friends all along and now she was sorry? Goddamn hypocrite! All of them, the whole lot – they all were goddamn hypocrites! As if they had really cared about anything! They could just go to hell, all of them!

He began to hate them.

His class-mates, his teachers, Gotham High, the German embassy, the US government – they all had taken the most important person out of his life and now they were sorry!

_Go to hell all of you! You all will repent of what you have done to me!´_

It was dark outside when Jonathan got home. Mrs. Crane was sitting in the kitchen. She had prepared dinner and the food was starting to get cold already. During the meal she tried to cheer her son up, chattering away about everything, but Jonathan wasn't listening, picking listlessly at his food.

"Mom, I'm not hungry.", he finally said looking at her "Can I leave? I'd like to go to my room."

"Jonathan, dear...", she said with a soft voice "I really do know, how you're feeling, but...life has to go on..."

"Oh, you really do, Mom? Do you really know, really, how I feel?", Jonathan interrupted her with a hiss and stood up.

"So life goes on, you say? You all act as if nothing has happened! My girlfriend is gone, I don't even know if she's still alive and you're all saying life goes on!"

"Jonathan, I didn't meant it like that..", she said, but he interrupted her again.

"Yes you did! You meant it exactly as you said it! Just say it, you are happy that she's gone! You _all_ are happy that she's gone!", Jonathan shouted, his voice filled with rage, anger.

"Jonathan, you don't know what you're saying", Mrs. Crane said finally, in a firm voice and stood up, too. "You're angry, you're sad, I know that and I understand it, please believe me. I do really know how it feels to be abandoned..."

This sentence cut Jonathan to the quick. He knew she could only be talking about his father now. He gazed into her eyes, still furious.

"There is a difference. Alexandra didn't abandon me, just because she couldn't stand being with me anymore!"

Jonathan's mother slapped him hard across his cheek. It turned red and was burning. Mrs. Crane's eyes were filled up with tears now.

"You will never ever say anything like this to me again, Jonathan Thomas Crane!", she hissed.

Jonathan didn't say anything, kicked his chair aside and left the kitchen. He heard his mother shouting, "Come back here, Jonathan!" when he got upstairs, to his room. He heard her again shouting something from the kitchen, but he couldn't understand what she was saying, and neither did he want to.

Jonathan slammed the door to his room behind him and locked it.


	22. Scarecrow

**Chapter 22 (Scarecrow)**

It was very late, but Jonathan couldn't sleep.

It was very warm tonight and the moon was shining bright, through his room window directly on his bed. Jonathan hadn't drawn the curtains shut and had left the window opened. A light breeze stirred the room. Jonathan was lying on the bed, staring out of the window up at the dark, starry sky. The pain in his cheek was almost gone, but his mother's slap had left red welts on it and his cheek was still burning. Or was it the heat of the night?

It was too warm for Jonathan to keep his pyjama on, so he got undressed and now he was lying naked on his bed. He had never done that before. He never went to sleep naked nor did he walk around in his room like this. The only time he had done that was about four weeks ago – when he was with Alexandra in the cabin.

_Alexandra, where are you? Where, for Heaven's sake, are you?...I miss you so much... I wish you were here.. I want to feel you again.. please come back to me...'_

Jonathan closed his eyes and fell into light sleep.

Jonathan felt something touch his skin, but he was neither able to move nor open his eyes. It felt warm and soft. It felt like a hand, placed softly on his chest. It felt good. The hand started moving across his chest - he could feel the fingers caressing his nipples, in circles. Jonathan sighed. Suddenly he felt a light breeze, as if something had lifted up his blanket. The hand crossed over his chest and slipped under his blanket. It slipped over his abdomen down to his penis. Jonathan felt the hand enclosing his cock, starting to massage it. Jonathan moaned softly.

_´Oh, this was so good!´_

He felt his manhood getting hard. Suddenly he felt something warm, wet on his nipple and a second hand on his chest. He could feel something nibbling softly on his nipples; it felt like teeth. Jonathan felt something kissing and licking his nipples. It felt like a mouth, like a tongue. Jonathan still didn't open his eyes and as if he were in a trance, reached out his hand, as if to touch who or what was caressing him like this. He felt soft, long, curly hair - it felt so familiar.

What was happening to him?

Jonathan felt the second hand pulling away the blanket from his body, and he felt the mouth and tongue moving over his chest and abdomen, licking and kissing. His hand clutched lightly at the curly hair, following its path down. Jonathan moaned. It all felt so good; he felt himself getting hot. But who or what was pleasing him so much?  
Jonathan lifted up his head and opened his eyes. He could see brown curly hair, a face, a mouth kissing his abdomen; he could see a tongue licking its way down, down to his loins.

"Alexandra?", Jonathan whispered, panting softly.

Was it really her?

She gazed up at him, her blue-grey eyes flashing, her mouth still on his abdomen, licking and kissing. She smiled lightly.

Oh yes, it was her!

Then Jonathan could see her mouth slipping down to his cock. Alexandra licked it and then put it with a deep moan into her mouth. Jonathan groaned out loud and his head slipped back on the bed. His hand grabbed fistfuls of her hair. Jonathan felt Alexandra's head moving up and down. She sucked and licked his hardened cock with so much desire. He could hear Alexandra sighing and moaning over and over again.

"Oh Alex, please don't stop. You are doing this so well..", Jonathan panted.

Suddenly Alexandra moved up and started to kiss him wildly. He could feel some of the taste of his own cock in his mouth. Alexandra's hand was still enclosing his manhood, massaging it again. Alexandra had opened her thighs and now knelt down over Jonathan. He could feel her hot wet snatch on his abdomen. He placed his hands on Alexandra's hips, swallowing heavily.

"How did you get here?", Jonathan started, but Alexandra placed a finger on his lips, bowed down over him and kissed him again, wild and passionate.

Jonathan straightened up as much as he could and caressed her back with his hands. It was obvious that she didn't want to talk now.

"What are you going to do? What do you want me to do?", Jonathan whispered, panting and Alexandra pushed him lightly back on the bed, gazing into his eyes.

Their lips brushed and Jonathan could feel her hot breath.

"I'll ride you..", she whispered and smiled. "I'll put a saddle on you and ride you hard, my stallion."

Even before Jonathan could say anything, Alexandra mounted him. His cock entered her deeply with a hard thrust and both groaned aloud in their lust.

Jonathan placed his hands on Alexandra's hips again, watching her thrusting his cock deep into her. With every thrust she groaned aloud and her body pranced. Jonathan could see Alexandra's hardened nipples, waiting desirously to be kissed and licked. His hands moved up and covered her breasts, his fingers caressing her nipples. Jonathan wanted to straighten up to please them with his kisses and his tongue, but Alexandra was thrusting his cock so deep and so wildly into her, that he couldn't move at all. He placed his hands on her hips again, just observing and enjoying, how Alexandra rode him.

"Oh, I love your cock, my young, wild stallion!", Alexandra panted with desire.

Jonathan closed his eyes and his deep voice moaned.

"Alex, you're a bad girl .. you're .. a really .. really bad girl..."

"Do you want me to fuck you, my stallion? Say it, tell me you want it. Tell me and I'll fuck you, I'll fuck you hard."

"Yesssss..", Jonathan panted and moaned. "yes, fuck me, Alex – please fuck me!"

Both groaned aloud and Alexandra's thrusts got harder and stronger, so strong, that they started to hurt Jonathan. He opened his eyes.

"Alex, what are you doing?", he panted, gazing at her, but she wasn't listening at all and was getting wilder and wilder.

She closed her eyes and leaned back. Jonathan's hands now clutched at her hips.

"Alex, what...?"

She opened her eyes looking at Jonathan.

"Do you want me to fuck you?", she shouted, but it wasn't her voice Jonathan could hear.

The voice sounded twisted, dark, scratchy – frightening.

Suddenly Alexandra began to disappear in front of Jonathan's eyes, she literally seemed to vanish into thin air!

"Oh my God! Alexandra!", Jonathan screamed and tried to hold on to her, but instead of her warm soft flesh he gripped the air.

He couldn't understand what has just happened and he was seized with panic.

Jonathan opened his eyes.

He lifted up his head, looking around bewildered. He was alone in his room, his blanket next to him, his body soaked with sweat. He panted. Alexandra wasn't nowhere around.

_+"Do you want me to fuck you?"+_

The voice, this horrible voice, he could hear it again!

"Who are you?" Jonathan shouted, looking down at himself. He could see his right hand around his penis, moving up and down very fast. He tried to stop and to pull his hand away, but he couldn't. It was as if his hand had a life of its own.

_+"Do you want me to fuck you? I'll fuck you hard, my stallion!"+ _

Again this terrible voice!

Jonathan's eyes filled up with tears. That voice, that terrible voice! And his hand around his cock, which wouldn't stop masturbating.

"Please! Stop it! Stop it!", Jonathan whimpered.

Then Jonathan groaned loudly and he came, wild and intense. He came over his legs and his bed. Jonathan panted. His hand released his penis and Jonathan felt some measure of control over himself again. When his body relaxed and he caught breath again, he turned on to his side and curled up like a baby. His body was trembling and his hands clutched his pillow.  
He couldn't even begin to understand what had just happened.

Where was Alexandra?

She had been here, just seconds ago, he could feel her, he could taste her kisses, he could feel her thrusts. But what had just happened! Had he only imagined all of this? Had it not been Alexandra, who had fucked him? Had he just masturbated the whole time? Jonathan felt tears running down his face.

_+"My stallion, did you really believe it was she who was fucking you?"+ _

That voice again! Jonathan covered his ears with his hands.

"Shut up! Shut up!", he yelled.

_+"Did you really believe she came back to you, stupid boy? Just look at yourself! Do you really believe she wants to be with such a cry-baby, a slacker like you?"+ _

"She loves me, I know she loves me!", Jonathan sobbed.

_+"You stupid, little dreamer! This bitch has simply taken from you what she wanted! She just wanted your cock, nothing more!"+ _

"No, that's not true! That's not Alexandra! I know she loves me and I know she will come back to me!"

_+"She is dead, you little fucker! And if she's not, you should kill her. Her and all the others!"+ _

"Shut up! Leave me alone!", Jonathan yelled.

_+"You little freak! You little useless freak!"+ _

"Who are you!"

_+"You know exactly who I am!"+ _

Jonathan could hear the flapping of wings, he could hear a horrible noise, a scream... a screeching noise ... made by birds...like it was ravens...no, not ravens...  
.. it was crows, yes .. crows!

Jonathan buried his face into the pillow and cried bitterly.


	23. MrsCrane

**Chapter 23 (Mrs. Crane)**

Now three months had passed, since Alexandra was torn from Jonathan´s life. Three months without her, without a message from her, without knowing, where she was, if she was okay – if she was alive at all!

Jonathan still pursued all news coming from Europe. Many cities in Germany and France had been destroyed and lots of people had lost their homes, but it looked like the end of the war was near to come. But to Jonathan it was hard to believe it and to hope, that it´ll happen soon. But he neither could nor even wanted to lose hope! Being full of hope, that Alexandra was still alive and that he would see her again, was now the only thing remaining to him  
- the only thing giving him enough strength to suffer his current life.

Mrs. Crane and Jonathan didn´t talked to each other almost a week now. She heard him groaning and screaming the night after their dispute, but she neither knocked at the door of his room to ask what happened nor she asked him about it the following days . It wouldn´t be the only night she heard him groaning and screaming when he was in his room. Mrs. Crane noticed that after a night like this, Jonathan always took his used sheets to launder them by himself. On the day after their dispute she found a towel, obviously forgotten by Jonathan, to launder it too. The towel was smeared all over with his semen. Mrs. Crane knew what this meant. Her son wasn´t a child anymore with his 17 years! And although Jonathan never told her, she knew that he has lost his virginity to Alexandra the night they´ve spent together in the cabin. Or had they slept together for a longer time already and Mrs. Crane just didn´t know about it? She now was aware of the fact that at least physically Jonathan wasn´t a little boy anymore - and it was up to her now to treat him accordingly.

Maybe she hadn´t been aware enough of his condition when they had their dispute. On the one hand, he recently had discovered his sexuality, on the other hand, the person, who discovered and shared his sexuality with him, was suddenly torn from his life without any early warning. It was obvious, that these nights where she heard him groaning and screaming were nights where he worked off his rage in a sexual way – maybe his one and only way to work off his sorrow for Alexandra. How could she blame him at all?

_I was too hard on him.´, _Mrs. Crane thought by herself.

She called him into the living-room this afternoon when Jonathan got home back from school again. Without saying anything he heard her apologizing to him for slapping him that day. Mrs. Crane promised him to listen better to her son, to be there for him and to help him, whenever he would need her help. Jonathan´s dark expression on his face started to bright up. He also apologized to his mother for his comment made on their dispute and both embraced each other. Jonathan was relieved to have resolved with her – he has enough problems already, he even didn´t need anymore, especially not with his mother.

Mrs. Crane embraced Jonathan. She was happy, that all was cleared up now   
– but she could feel, that her son wasn´t the same as before...


	24. 4th of July

**Chapter 24 (4th of July)**

It was 3rd of july and in Gotham all preparation for the upcoming Independence Day celebrations were at their full swing now.

Jonathan just had finished his homework, when he heard the front door was opened and his mother stepped in carrying two big shopping bags. He jumped to the door to take the bags from her.

„Thank you, dear.", she sighed in relief "This is so nice from you.."

"You´re welcome.", Jonathan said and smiled lightly, then carried the bags into the kitchen.

Mrs. Crane gazed after him. She didn´t hear him groaning and screaming in the night for two days now. Obviously he finally could calm down and above all he could sleep through the whole night without waking up over and over again. His skin had been so pale over the last weeks and today he looked rested, fresh and relaxed for the first time.

_Maybe it was just because of the sorrow and Jonathan was still the same as he had been before.´, _Mrs. Crane thought and went into the kitchen.

Jonathan started to unpack the shopping bags and placed the groceries into the cupboards. Mrs. Crane helped him.

„All the town had turned out.", she said, while putting some cans into the cupboard next to her „It´ll be great tomorrow, I´m sure!"

„Hmmm..", Jonathan made with a dry voice.

He didn´t like parades and fanfare like this at all, but he knew, his mother was talking about _this _right now. Mrs. Crane turned around towards him.

„Hey, what do you think about going to Central Park tomorrow to watch the parade?", she asked in a cheerful voice.

´_Oh no, I knew this would come!´, _Jonathan thought.

„Ahh, I don´t know...", he said, with a puffing tone in his voice and gazed at his mother.

_Only Mom can take pleasure in such trivial things like that!´_

„Come on, do me the favor!", Mrs. Crane said, then giggled „It´s gonna be fun for sure!"

Jonathan pouted.

_+„Stupid boy, you aren´t serious now, are you! We aren´t here at kindergarten! Tell this bitch, you won´t go anywhere!"+_  
+„Shut up! This woman is my mother and I´ll do her a favor. End of discussion!"+

„Come on!", Mrs. Crane said, gazing at Jonathan „Just say Yes´!"

Jonathan sighed; he couldn´t refuse her.

„Okay, Mom. If you really want to go, then we´ll go."

Mrs. Crane chuckled, pressed Jonathan against her and gave him a big kiss on to his cheek.

„I knew you wouldn´t be a killjoy!", she said happily and left the kitchen, starting to sing aloud. Jonathan gazed after her.

_Yes.´, _he thought by himself _Maybe it was now time to play.´_


	25. The Vision

**Chapter 25 (The Vision)**

It was a bright beautiful day - perfect for Independence Day´s celebrations.

Gotham Central Park was already crowded when Jonathan and his mother arrived. Mrs. Crane looked relaxed and satisfied. She was happy. Yes, she was happy because to her it looked like Jonathan was doing fine again.

„Blue skieees smiling on meee, nothing but blue skieees do I seeee" , Mrs. Crane sang out aloud, pressing Jonathan against her.

"Mom..", Jonathan shouted and made a pouty face.

_You´re singing out of tune!´, _he wanted to say, but he kept it to himself.

This was so embarrassing! His mother was acting like a teenager! But when he realized how happy she was, he didn´t want to put her out of temper.

_Come on, so what? Enjoy the day! At least, give it a try!´, _Jonathan thought by himself.

He could hear the cheering people. He watched children laughing and playing and could see the marching bands and the show-cars, preparing themselves and forming up for their performance. Jonathan sighed – and he thought of Alexandra. She was in war zone and he was here joining this trivial play!

_No, don´t do this.. Don´t think of her now!´, _Jonathan thought.

He didn´t come further, because the first marching band started to play and Jonathan was torn from his thoughts.

„Whoa, this is loud!", Jonathan yelled and covered his ears.

His mother gazed at him. No wonder, they were standing right next to the marching band!

„Come on, let´s go over there!", Mrs. Crane shouted and they walked away on the other side.

The people standing next to the parade route laughed cheerfully and applauded when the parade started to move. Mrs. Crane looked happily at Jonathan; he forced himself to smile. The crowd started to move with the rhythm of the music and clapped their hands. Jonathan looked into happy and smiling faces all around him.

_What exactly am I doing here?´_

As if she could read his mind, she nudged him in his side. Mrs. Crane laughed and clapped her hands to the music. Jonathan smiled lightly, but his smile still looked agonized. Mrs. Crane started to move, as she was dancing and tried to animate Jonathan to join her to dance. He followed her and started to clap his hands and to move too.

_+„Stupid boy, are we here at kindergarten!"+ _

„Just shut up!"+

Jonathan danced and clapped and for the first time he was laughing aloud and happiness covered his face.

Suddenly in a split second a stabbing pain flashed through Jonathan´s body and tore him out of his good mood. The music got apruptly loud and the laughter and the voices around him went into his head like a thunderstroke. Jonathan writhed with pain and gripped the area around his abdomen and his hips. Mrs. Crane first continued dancing, because she thought that Jonathan was joking around, but then she realized that something was wrong with him.

„Good Lord, Jonathan!", she shouted and touched her son „What happened!"

His body winced under her touch. Jonathan staggered and bumped into the people standing around him, who either didn´t react at all or were just looking at him in bewilderment. Jonathan screamed in pain.

„My God, Jon, what is it!", his mother cried in panic, touched his arm and tried to pull him out of the crowd.

Jonathan whimpered, still writhing in pain. Both stumbled out of the crowd and rested at a big tree nearby the passing parade. Jonathan pressed himself against the tree, becuase he could feel his legs giving way. He panted. Mrs. Crane caressed his back, her eyes filling up with tears.

„ Jonathan! What the matter with you? Please Lord, tell me!"

Jonathan still could hear the jumble of music, the laughing voices, his laughing mother. He could see a storm of pictures in front of his eyes: the park, the parade, the laughing people  
- and suddenly he could see bombs. He saw tanks and rifles. He saw destroyed homes, soldiers, strange faces. He could see Mr. and Mrs. Wentzler. He saw Martin. He saw Alexandra. He watched her screaming and whimpering. He could hear the cry of a baby. He could hear the screaming of birds, he could hear the Scarecrow…

„Noo!", Jonathan yelled and tears were running down his face.

„Oh God, Jon!"

„Mom!", he sobbed and panted „Please take me home!"

Irving Berlin: "Blue Skies"


	26. The Desease

**Chapter 26 (The Desease)**

Mrs. Crane has taken Jonathan to the car as fast as she could and drove off, wheels squealing.

She was seized with a wild panic. She drove as far as she could, but she still had to take a circutious route because a lot of streets being had been cordoned off, for the parade.

The pain hadn´t died down or subsided at all. Jonathan crouched in his seat, still clutching his abdomen and his hips, whimpering in pain. Mrs. Crane was shouting his name over and over again, trying to figure out, what had happened, what was happening to him, but Jonathan kept on saying „Bring me home! Bring me home!" over and over again.

When they finally reached home, Mrs. Crane had to support Jonathan, so that he could walk slowly into the house, up the stairs, up into his room. Mrs. Crane helped him lie down on the bed, then she rushed downstairs to call up their family doctor, Dr. Luis Burton.

Dr. Burton had known Jonathan all his life, since his childhood.. Mrs. Crane owed him a lot, because he had always given them medical treatment without charging for anything. Dr. Burton was aware that the Crane family wasn´t able to pay expensive doctor´s bills.

A quarter of an hour after her call, Dr. Burton arrived at the Crane´s house. Jonathan was still lying on his bed, still whimpering and crying in pain. The doctor gave him an injection immediately to stop Jonathan´s convulsions and to lessen his pain. The injection started to have an effect and little by little Jonathan´s body relaxed, so Dr. Burton could examine him. His mother was standing outside in the hallway, waiting for the door to open and for Dr. Burton to come out. The whimpers coming out of Jonathan´s room, got softer. Mrs. Crane could hear a ratteling noise, something metallic, from the room. Then she heard steps, the doorknob turned and the doctor came out.

„Jonathan is sleeping for now. I gave him a sedative.", said Dr. Burton, keeping the door ajar so Mrs. Crane could take a peek at Jonathan.

He still was whimpering a bit, but it seemed like he finally calmed down. Dr. Burton closed the door quietly and touched Mrs. Crane´s arm. Both went downstairs into the living room.

„Luis, what is the matter with him?", Mrs. Crane asked. Both had known each other for many years now and sometimes, they just started to call each other by their first names.

„Well firstly.. Jonathan is running a high temperature.", Dr. Burton explained. „ I gave him a pain-killer and it will also help bring down his temperature. Jonathan told me, he was feeling a severe pain in his abdomen and his hips, going down to his loins.."

The doctor gazed at Mrs. Crane.

"And what does it mean?", she asked.

„I´m not sure..", Dr. Burton said. „I would like to examine him more and to do some more tests, but he should be in hospital for that... now, I know how difficult this would be for you, without proper health insurance, Sheila. So first I´ll try to help you as best as I can."

He gazed into Sheila´s eyes.

„I´ve taken a blood sample and I´ll take it to my lab today. Maybe we´ll have some more information then. For now, it´s important for Jonathan to rest and allow the medicine to act."

Mrs. Crane nodded.

„This is the pain-killer. I´ve written the dosage on the package. If Jonathan should have a seizure again, the other one is the sedative."

Dr. Burton passed the two packages over to Mrs. Crane. Their finger tips touched for a moment and Luis and Sheila looked at each other, blushing.

„Has Jonathan been under any kind of unusual stress, these past few days?", Dr. Burton asked to break up their awkwardness.

„He lost his girlfriend a few weeks ago, because of the war in Europe.", Mrs. Craine explained „The girl is German and was sent back when the war broke out. I was at the German embassy with Jonathan, when the rioting and chaos broke out . There he saw the girl for the last time and since then, we haven´t heard anything about her. All this has taken its toll on Jonathan, I think."

Dr. Burton took a deep breath.

„But the worst thing is:", Sheila said and touched Luis´ arm, as with every word she got more upset and her voice got louder. „Jonathan groans and screams almost every night, he doesn´t eat, he speaks to himself and as if that were not enough, he also masturbates every night! Today he was more or less normal for the first time and now this... this breakdown! I don´t understand it! Jonathan is not the same as before.."

„Sheila!", Luis said and held her hand, which was still resting on his arm. „The boy has lost his girlfriend! He _can´t_ be the same as always, he is in mourning right now. Everybody has their own way of dealing with sorrow. There are people who just ignore it, others go crazy..."

„So, is that what you think, that Jonathan is crazy!", Sheila shouted in anger.

„No.", Luis said in a soft voice. „I didn´t mean it like that. I just believe that this has been all too much for Jonathan to handle. Today he simply got a message from his body, that he can´t go on like this. Give him time and support his as best as you can. Don´t put so much pressure on him. He´ll need time, until his life starts to become normal again."

„Yes, but.."

„Listen, let´s do this: first we´ll treat Jonathan´s physical problems. It is important to get him stabilized. If his condition worsens, I´ll take him to hospital. I´ll handle this. Now I´ll do some blood-work to check if there is anything specifically wrong. And I´ll call up some people to get psycological help for Jonathan. It´s possible that he´s simply suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder. I´m not an expert on it, but if so, he´ll need a special treatment."

„But, Luis, I can´t pay for all this..!"

„Don´t worry. I´ll handle that. For now, Jonathan should rest and you should do the same. And you should help him by doing what´s the best for him. Just think about it and give him what he wants the most."

Sheila nodded.

„Okay..." she said softly.

„Ill come back later to see Jonathan and to after you. Call me up if his condition gets worse..call me up at anytime.", Dr. Burton whispered and let go Mrs. Crane´s hand.

Both walked to the main door. Dr. Burton said good-bye to Mrs. Crane, got into his car and drove off. Mrs. Crane watched him drive away and closed the door.

_Just think about it and give him, what he wants the most .´ _she remembered Dr. Butron´s words..

_Could she really give him, or let him do, what Jonathan wanted most?´_, she thought even if she realized that her son had grown up and that she would have to let him go.


	27. Awakening

**Chapter 27 (Awakening)**

Jonathan opened his eyes.

The curtains of his room were drawn, but a ray of light entered into the room through a small slit. Jonathan touched his forehead. He could feel cold sweat on it. Then he touched his throat; it felt cold. His fever was gone.

Jonathan folded back his blanket and got up slowly. His body felt as heavy as a stone, but the convulsions had decreased. He could feel a stretching pain in his right shoulder and touched it after sitting down on the edge of the bed.

_Must come from lyíng in bed all the time. Who knows, how long I was unconscious. ´, _Jonathan thought.

He moaned softly when he got up and walked to the window. He ripped open the curtains and the sun shone brightly through the window. Jonathan had to put his hand in front of his eyes because the light dazzled him. Jonathan started to stretch his body.

_Oh man, I´m feeling like a truck ran over me.´, _Jonathan thought when he realized how tense his body was.

_What day was today? What time was it?´_

Jonathan didn´t have any idea and lost in his toughts, he passed his hand over his face. He could feel a light tickle on his throat; it was beard stubble.

But how long he has been asleep?

Jonathan decided to first take a shower and to shave. He turned around to go to his wardrobe, when he heard a knock at his door and his mother entered the room.

„Oh, Jonathan. You are awake!" She was surprised to see Jonathan standing in front of her.

„Hello Mom.", he said softly.

Mrs. Crane embraced him and placed her hand across his forehead.

„Ahh, your fever´s gone, that´s good.", she said, relieved „How do you feel?"

„Better.", Jonathan said, looking at his mother. „How long was I asleep?"

„Four days.", she responded „You had a very high temperature and were restless. Dr. Burton was here to look after you. Oh, I´m so happy, you´re getting better again."

Mrs. Crane didn´t mention, that Jonathan has shouted Alexandra´s name over and over again in his delirium.

" Do you still have pain?", she asked.

„I still feel groggy and my body hurts, but I think, I´ll feel better after a shower.", Jonathan said.

Mrs. Crane caressed his hair, which was wet because of the sweat.

„Then go ahead, my dear. This will be good for you."

Jonathan nodded.

„Can I leave you alone for one or two hours?", Mrs. Crane asked. „I have to buy some food for us."

„Of course.", Jonathan said. „Don´t worry. I´m doing fine."

Mrs. Crane kissed him on his cheek.

„I´ll be right back." Then she left the room and closed the door.

Jonathan sighed softly. He could barely remember what happened  
- but this he could remember burned into his mind and he knew what to do. Jonathan took his clothes out of the wardobe and went into the bathroom.


	28. The Fight

**Chapter 28 (The Fight)**

Jonathan still was in the bathroom.

He had taken a long shower. He just stood under the shower, feeling how the water running down his body. He looked down at himself – and his memories came back into his mind, the ones of Alexandra and the night they spent together. He remebered what they have done. He could remember her embraces, her kisses, her touches. He wanted to feel her again.

_I can´t stay here anymore! I gotta look for her and I gotta find her!´, _Jonathan thought, turned off the water and stepped out of the shower.

He was standing in front of the wash basin, looking into the mirror right in front of him. Because of the shower the mirror fogged and Jonathan wiped off the glass with his hand. He had placed a towel around his hips – and he thought of Alexandra again. He was thinking of leading her hand to the towel to losen the knot. He was thinking of her pulling the towel away and how she would start to kiss him. She would caress his nipples and please them with her tongue. She would kiss his chest, kiss his abdomen and then move further, move down…

„Jonathan, concentrate! You have work to do!", he said to himself before splashing his face with ice cold water.

_+„So, you have work to do, stupid boy!"+ _

Jonathan looked up and gazed into the mirror, which was starting to fog again.

„I don´t remember to have called you.", Jonathan said with a firm voice.

_+„Who are you, that you think you could contradict me!"+ _

„I don´t listen to you at all.", Jonathan said and gripped the bottle of shaving foam.

He spread the foam over his face, then started to shave. Scarecrow kept on talking insistently to Jonathan, but he didn´t answer him at all. He kept on shaving with all easiness, pretending he wouldn´t hear Scarecrow at all. Scarecrow boiled with rage.

_+„I don´t like it at all being ignored!"+ _

Suddenly Jonathan could feel a pain at his throat.

He touched himself under his chin and felt something warm and wet at his fingertips. It was blood. Jonathan had cut himself with the razor. He looked into the mirror, his eyes full of anger.

„And I don´t like it at all getting hurt!" he hissed.

He grabbed the packet with the replacement blades for his razor. He could hear Scarecrow saying _+ „You freak, what are you doing there!"+ _ , when Jonathan put a blade out of the packet and placed it with shaking hands on his left arm, next to his artery.

„Now do you want to take the risk!", Jonathan yelled, looking into the mirror. „If I fall, then you´ll fall with me! So stop hurting me!"

„_You little freak, you god damn..!"+ _

„Don´t call me Freak´ and don´t call me Boy´!", Jonathan shouted, pressing the blade against his arm so hard it now started to hurt. „My name is Jonathan! Jonathan Crane! And now _you_ will do, what I say!"

For the first time Scarecrow kept silent.

Jonathan smiled softly. For the first time in all these weeks he could hold his own and make head way against Scarecrow! Jonathan bent forward and gazed into the mirror.

„And I´ll tell you something else!", Jonathan said with a firm voice. „I will go! I will go and seek her. I´ll seek her because I know that I love her and because I know she loves me. And you – you won´t stop me!"

_+„Jonathan...!"+ _

„You won´t stop me! Did you hear me? No one will stop me now!", Jonathan yelled and punched with his fist against the mirror. It shattered loudly.

And again Scarecrow kept silent.


	29. The Decision

**Chapter 29 (The Decision)**

Because of his punch against the mirror, Jonathan´s hand got injured and blood ran into the wash basin.

He opened the small cupboard next to him and pulled out a first-aid kit. He started to clean up and to desinfect his wound carefully. Then he bandaged his hand.

His mother wasn´t at home yet, so he could dress and clean up the bathroom without a hurry. Jonathan didn´t know yet, how to explain to her this with the mirror – but it was more important to tell her, he would leave. He knew, he would break her heart, but he got to find Alexandra - at any price.

He had thrown away the smashed mirror when his mother got back home. Jonathan was waiting in the kitchen when Mrs. Crane stepped in.

„Hi, my dear.", she said softly.

„Hi, Mom.", Jonathan said, lightly surprised, that he couldn´t find a shopping bag. „I thought, you wanted to buy food."

But Mrs. Crane didn´t respond and gazed at Jonathan´s bandaged hand.

„What happened?", she asked.

„I broke the mirror in the bathroom.", Jonathan answered, expecting his mother to comment it in a way, but she didn´t.

For a short moment they just gazed at each other.

„Mom, we need to talk.", Jonathan said with a soft voice.

Mrs. Crane nodded.

„I know.", she said and took a seat.

So did Jonathan.

„Mom, I´ll leave. I got to find her. I got to find Alexandra.", he said with a trembling voice.

„You want to go to Germany, am I right?", she asked and touched his injured hand.

Jonathan nodded.

„I had a vision when we were in the park, on the parade. This pain, it had to do something with her. I don´t know, what it means, but I can´t stay here. I got to seek her and I have to find her.", Jonathan said, sighing softly. „Can you understand, how do I feel?"

„I do.", Mrs. Crane said „And I´ll help you in my way."

With this words, Mrs. Crane pushed a white envelope over the table top into Jonathan´s direction. He gazed at her, surprised.

„What is this?", he asked.

„Just look for yourself.", Mrs. Crane answered.

Jonathan took the envelope into his hand and opened it. He pulled out a sheet of paper and a passport. It was his passport._Walker Aviation Services´_ Jonathan read on the top of the paper.

„What is it?", he asked again.

Mrs. Crane sighed.

„This is your ticket to Germany.", she said. „W.A.S. executes flights to Germany for the U.S. army. They transport medicine and clothings into the areas being cut off outer world...and tonight their route takes them to Wiesbaden."

Jonathan swallowed.

„You´ll be on board as official crew member of W.A.S., so you won´t have problems when you arrive in Germany. They told me, that civilian flights are still suspended."

Jonathan didn´t know what so say.

„But...how did you make it?", he whispered.

Mrs. Crane gazed into his eyes.

„Peter Walker owed me a favor. He´ll pick you up here and he´ll take you to the airfield. You have now 2 hours to pack up.", she said and smiled lightly.

Even before Jonathan could say anything she passed another envelope to him.

„Open it."

Jonathan´s hands were shaking, when he opened the envelope and took a glance into it. He couldn´t believe, what he was seeing inside.

„Mom!", he said, but Mrs. Crane interrupted him.

„This is all, what I saved, Jon.", she said „5000 Dollars. It´s all your´s."

„But Mom.", Jonathan whispered, shaking his head.

He was speechless.

„The money is your´s anyway. I´ve saved it for you and I want you to take it. I want you to have something in your hands - if you find Alexandra and you both decide not to come back."

Mrs. Crane could feel a stitch in her heart when she said this. Jonathan´s eyes filled up with tears. Now he realized that with his decision to go to Germany, he also would leave his old life behind him. He would leave Gotham – and he would also leave his mother.

„It hurts to grow-up, Jonathan.", Mrs. Crane said with a soft voice and smiled lightly. „And it´s not painful only for the children, but also for the parents."

Tears were running down Jonathan´s face. There still were so many things he wanted to tell her, but he couldn´t find the right words.

„Mom, I .."

„Go, my son. Go and find your love.", Mrs. Crane whispered and pressed Jonathan´s hand.


	30. Leaving the old life behind

**Chapter 30 (Leaving the old life behind)**

Jonathan rushed upstairs into his room.

His body was trembling and it was difficult for him to calm down. Nervously he picked his personal things, that he wanted to take to Germany and packed them up into a sea-bag. He was still wearing Alexandra´s necklace - he hadn´t taken it off since the day, Alexandra had given it to him.

He rummaged through a small box of photos, of him and Alexandra. These photos had been taken last year at Gotham High´s Summer Celebration and Jonathan has kept them like a precious treasure. Now he knew, he would need them in Germany to find Alexandra.

When Jonathan was ready, he took a look at his room for the last time, at his old life for a last time before he stepped out of his room with the sea-bag in his hand. He hadn´t realized how fast these two hours had passed. Peter Walker would pick him up soon and take him to the airfield.

Jonathan was surprised to see Dr. Burton standing in the main entrance when he went downstairs. Mrs. Crane stood next to him.

„Hello Jonathan.", Dr. Burton greeted him „Your mother called me up, telling me you would leave us. So I came here to say good-bye to you."

Jonathan was amazed. He didn´t expect to see Dr. Burton here. But he was glad to see him – at least his mom wouldn´t be all alone when he left to go to the airfield.

„Do you have packed everything you need?", Mrs. Crane asked and gazed at Jonathan.

„Yes. Yes, I think so.", Jonathan said with a soft voice and he could feel his heart getting heavy.

How could he say everything he wanted to tell her?

„Mom, there is so much, I wanted so say..", Jonathan whispered and tears filled up his eyes.

Mrs. Crane touched Jonathan´s cheek.

"I know, my son.", she said „But you don´t need to say anything. I already know..."

Suddenly a horn honked outside. It was Peter Walker, who has arrived at the Crane´s house.  
Jonathan´s mother sighed heavily.

„It´s time to go.", she whispered.

Dr. Burton took Jonathan´s sea-bag and stepped out of the house into the front garden. Mrs. Crane touched Jonathan´s hand and for a moment, they gazed at each other. Then they stepped out the main door, out into the front garden. Dr. Burton had loaded Jonathan´s sea-bag into Mr. Walker´s car and both men talked to each other. Mr. Walker waved to Mrs. Crane and to Jonathan in greeting. Jonathan and Mrs. Crane stopped.

„Mom, promise me that you´ll take good care of yourself.", Jonathan whispered and his voice started to tremble.

Mrs. Crane took Jonathan´s face into her hands.

„I will.", she said, then they embraced each other.

„I love you, Mom.", Jonathan whispered, fighting his tears. „I.. thank you for everything."

„Go, my son.", she said softly and her eyes filled up with tears, too. „Go and find your love."

Dr. Burton has walked up and was now standing next to Mrs. Crane. Jonathan looked at Dr. Burton and shook his hand.

„Thank you for everything, Dr. Burton", Jonathan said.

„Good luck, my son.", he answered and to Jonathan´s surprise he pulled him towards him and embraced him. Jonathan returned his embrace though he didn´t know why. „Take care of yourself."

Jonathan looked at them, then he walked over to Mr. Walker´s car and got in.

„I´ll take care of your son, Mrs. Crane.", Mr. Walker said and waved to her to say good-bye.

Mrs. Crane nodded without saying anything.Jonathan gazed at her and Dr. Burton for the last time, when Mr. Walker started the car and they drove off down the street.

Mrs. Crane and Dr. Burton were standing next to each other, gazing after the car until they couldn´t see it any more. Luis touched Sheila´s hand and pressed it lightly.

„Have I done the right thing, Luis?", she asked.

„Yes. Yes, I think you have done the right thing, Sheila.", he said in a soft voice. „You couldn´t have stopped him."

Sheila Crane shook her head.

„I didn´t mean that.", she said, looking at Luis Burton. „Was it right, never to tell Jonathan that you are his father, Luis?"

Luis gazed into her eyes, not knowing what to say. At this moment Sheila Crane knew, she commited a betrayal. She hadn´t betrayed Eliott Crane, her ex-husband, who had abandoned the family very early, the man, Jonathan barely remembered.

She hadn´t betrayed Dr. Luis Burton, Jonathan´s real father, who tried to be near his son and help him by being their family doctor.

No, it was Jonathan. She had betrayed Jonathan, her own son.

This was her first, and maybe her only time, she had betrayed him as his mother.


	31. The trip to Germany

**Chapter 31 (The trip to Germany)**

It was almost midnight, when the plane took off Gotham military airbase, to Germany.

Mr. Walker, who was co-pilot on the flight, had taken Jonathan to the airbase tower to go through all formalities with him. As Mrs. Crane has told him, Jonathan would be on board as an official crew member of the W.A.S. Mr. Walker had handed him a flying suit and a pair of combat boots.

„This is your official clothing.", he´d said „We still are at war."

Then he had given him a W.A.S. identification card and a piece of paper, some sort of special permit.

„You should have these things with you all the time. And don´t lose them.", Mr. Walker had admonished Jonathan. „And you should take off your glasses, too. You look too boyish to be going to war."

„Yes, sir.", Jonathan had whispered and put the glasses safely into his sea-bag.

Mr. Walker looked over Jonathan and touched him lightly on the shoulder.

„You gonna make it.", he´d said, trying to encourage Jonathan.

He had been in the war zone numerous times and he knew the misery, the sorrow and the chaos. Mr. Walker could imagine, how uncomfortable Jonathan must feel.

Jonathan had changed his clothes quickly and walked over with Mr. Walker to a Lockheed C-130 Hercules, a big aircraft made for transportation. As an official crew member of W.A.S., Jonthan had helped to load up the plane with assorted packages and sacks. Besides of Mr. Walker and the pilot, the crew consisted of four men who had loaded up the aircraft very quickly. Jonathan had felt like being out of place, but the men had encouraged him and praised him for his good work. They even joked around with him as if he was going to be with the crew for a long time.

Jonathan had been suprised and confused. So did he actually have to go to war first to be worthy of notice? Or did they know why he was here and they had compassion for him?

It took two more hours, before the aircraft was restocked and ready for take off. Jonathan felt uneasy when the four huge propellers of the Hercules started to turn and the plane moved. The deep drone of the motors was defeating and the aircraft´s vibration pierced Jonathan´s body. The crew was sitting relaxed on their seats, even joking around! Jonathan swallowed. He could feel himself starting to sweat. He had been on a passenger plane once in his life, but this here was – hell!

„Take off and landing are always the worst!", Jack, one of the men, shouted at him. He seemed to realize, how bad Jonathan felt. „Just close your eyes and take a deep breath, boy!"

Jonathan did.

The drone got louder and the aircraft vibrated heavily when it reached its final position and was now accelerating for take off. Jonathan forced himself to breath deeply and to keep his eyes closed the entire time during take off. He never heard a loud drone, like this, before in his life and he had the feeling, his eardrums would rupture any moment.  
After a few minutes, the plane stopped vibrating. Jonathan could hear a clicking noise - it was the seat-belts as crew members unbuckled.

„Hey, boy. It´s all over. Just relax.", Jack said. Jonathan opened his eyes.

„Thank you.", he whispered.

He watched the crew members leaving their saets. The started to smoke and to talk to each other. Jonathan remained seated. He didn´t know what to do. He opened his sea-bag and pulled out the photos, he had taken from home. He placed them in his hand, going through them. He and Alexandra looked so happy together, although they hadn´t been a couple at this time.

Jonathan looked at each photo. He remembered where and how the photos had been taken and he smiled lightly. Alexandra and Jonathan looked serious, in others, they were fooling around in front of the camera. Jonathan looked at the next photo. It was a close-up picture of Alexandra. Jonathan looked at it for a very long time and moved his fingers over the photo, as if he was caressing Alexandra.

„Alex.", Jonathan whispered. „I am coming to you. Hold on, I´ll be with you soon."

Jonathan leaned his head against the headrest and closed his eyes.

_I will save you, my guardian angel. I will find you and I will save you.´ _Jonathan thought  
– and fell asleep, holding the pictures firmly in his hand.

He didn´t realize as his grip loosened and the fotos fell from his hand. Jonathan also didn´t realize, when Mr. Walker stepped into cargo space, looked at him and picked up the fallen pictures. He gazed at them shortly and put them back on top of Jonathan´s sea-bag. He would find them when he was awake.

„You have courage, Jonathan Crane.", Mr.Walker said softly, watching the young sleeping man in front of him, in his flying suit and his combat boots. „By God, you really have courage."

Then Mr. Walker stepped out of cargo area and went back to the cockpit.


	32. Wiesbaden !

**Chapter 32 (Wiesbaden !)**

The aircraft hit turbulence, just as Jonathan awakened. He startled as he felt the vibrations.

„Don´t panic!", Jack shouted „We ´re about to land in Wiesbaden!"

Jonathan reached for his seat-belt, but it was already fastened. Apparently he had been asleep for the entire flight without getting up once.

_The photos, where are the photos!´_

Jonathan caught them lying on top of his sea-bag. Because of the turbulence, they started to slide and fall off on the floor. Jonathan picked them up and placed them safely into the side-pocket of his overall. For a split second, he wondered which of the crew had looked at the pictures when he was asleep, but then the increasing turbulence tore Jonathan from his thoughts.

„Jonathan, close your eyes and breathe, just as you did before.", Jack shouted at him „Now it´s gonna rock."

Just as Jack said this, the plane rocked violently. Jonathan closed his eyes. An air-pocket made the aircraft pitch down. Jonathan felt himself feeling sick. He could hear the loud drone of the propellers again. Would he crash now and never see Alexandra ?

Jonathan´s hands clutched his seat. The plane kept on losing altitude and suddenly Jonathan felt a heavy shock.

_Oh God, something´s broken! A wing has broken. Something´s broken!´, _Jonathan thought and he gasped.

But the plane had just touched down. They had arrived in Germany. Jonathan opened his eyes and sighed in relief. So did the crew.

„Welcome to Airbase Wiesbaden-Erbenheim, Jonathan!", one of the men shouted.

Jonathan drew a deep breath.

Finally he was in Germany. Finally he was closer to Alexandra.

_I am coming to you, my angel´_.

But where would he start? He only had her name, he didn´t even have an address. But there had to be something, there had to be an authority who could help him, who knew where to find Alexandra and her family!

In the meantime, the plane had taxied to its final stop and the motors had been turned off. Jonathan enjoyed a short moment of silence as the crew members unbuckled their seat-belts and got up, talking to each other. He stretched his body, because he was so tense due the long flight. Suddenly he heard a buzzing sound. The loading ramp of the aircraft had been opened. The daylight flooded in and the fresh air filled up the plane. It was already afternoon in Wiesbaden. Jonathan assumed he would help the crew unload the plane before he could start to look for Alexandra. So he followed them out of the plane.

The airbase´s staff drove up with vans and the crew started to load them up with the plane´s cargo when Mr.Walker called Jonathan over.

"Do you already know where to look for her?", Mr. Walker asked and for a split second, Jonathan was confused. Then he realized, that he could only mean Alexandra. Jonathan shook his head.

„No, I don´t have any address or phone number", he said softly.

Mr. Walker waved to a soldier, who came over and looked again at Jonathan.

„Go, get your stuff, Jonathan."

Jonathan nodded. He ran over to the plane to get his sea-bag and returned. Mr. Walker was talking to the soldier as Jonathan walked up.

„I´ll get you into the center of the city.", Mr. Walker said, looking at the soldier. „Get your jeep, Private."

„Yes, Sir!", the soldier said and saluted, then he left to get his jeep.

„Here, take this. Maybe it´ll be good to have it with you.", Mr. Walker said as he pulled a gun out of his belt, and passed it to Jonathan.

„No, no.", Jonathan said, shaking his head „I´m not here to fight or to kill anybody. I just want to find my girlfriend."

„Take it! At least for your own protection.", Mr. Walker said and handed the gun to Jonathan, who resisted at first, but then gripped it.

„I´am afraid I can´t go with you, Jonathan. But I do hope you find her.", Mr. Walker said and looked at Jonathan.

„Thank you.", Jonathan whispered and put the gun into a side-pocket of his overall. In the meantime the Private had driven up with his jeep.

„We´ll be here until tomorrow. Our flight to Gotham leaves at 6 p.m.", Mr. Walker said and touched him lightly on the shoulder. „And now go. Go and find her."

„Thank you, Mr. Walker. Thank you for everything.", Jonathan whispered. Mr. Walker shook his hand, not knowing if he would ever see this boy again.

„Good luck, Jonathan.", he said.

Jonathan looked over to the crew. Jack and the other crewmembers waved to him.

„Good luck, boy and take care of yourself!", he could hear them shouting.

Jonathan waved back at them, then he got into the jeep and they drove off the airbase, into the heart of the city.


	33. The destroyed city

**Chapter 33 (The destroyed city)**

A thousand thoughts flashed through Jonathan´s mind during the ride to the city center.

What would it be like when he saw Alexandra again, what should he tell her? How would she react when she saw him again? Would she be happy to see him? Did she still feel the same, feel like he felt about her?

_But how can you even doubt that, Jonathan Crane?_´, he thought _You know, what she feels for you!´_.

Jonathan knew he was more than willing to do everything that had to be done.

He would stay with her in Germany, if Alexandra wanted. He would care for her, he would live together with her. He would marry her if Alexandra wanted to marry him, too. Jonathan would be 18 in five months and he would persuade Alexandra´s parents to give their permisson for her to marry him before she came of age. And if Alexandra didn´t want to stay in Germany, he would start a new life with her somewhere else.

And if she wanted to, he would have children with her. Oh, there couldn´t be anything more beautiful in the world to him than marrying Alexandra and raising a family with her! They had some funds. It wasn´t a lot, but at least, it was enough for them to start. Everything else would fall into place!

Jonathan was so lost in this thoughts that he didn´t realize the jeep was moving deeper and deeper into the city, towards its center. At first, he didn´t notice the smashed streets and the destroyed buildings. He didn´t notice the people rushing through the streets, he didn´t notice the soldiers. Jonathan was terrified by this sight and was suddenly torn from his thoughts. He hadn´t expect to see something like this.

„It´s getting better now.", the soldier said „It looked even worse a few weeks ago."

„Where are we going?", Jonathan asked, looking at the soldier.

„I have orders to escort you to the City Hall, boy. Maybe you´ll find what you´re looking for there.", the G.I. said and turned onto a wide street called Wilhelmstrasse.

There were ruins and shattered glass everywhere. Although the weather was fine, the air was smoggy, caused by the swirling dust and smoke, coming out of the ruins. The soldier stopped the jeep.

„The City Hall is over there.", he said, pointing at the big market-place right next to them.

Jonathan looked at the building located on the market-place. „Don´t expect too much, boy.", the soldier said „But I wish you luck though."

„Thank you.", Jonathan said, looking at the soldier for a brief moment.

Then he gripped his sea-bag and stepped out of the jeep. The soldier nooded good-bye, then he stepped on the gas and drove off down the street. Jonathan gazed after him.

Suddenly he realized that he was all alone – alone in a strange country, where he didn´t even know the language, without knowing where he was and where he had to go. He was now in war zone, among all the destruction, among all the misery, among all the despair and the only glimmer of hope Jonathan had was to find the person again he loved so much, with all his heart.

Jonathan sighed and crossed the market-place, in the direction of the City Hall.


	34. The Search

**Chapter 34 (The Search)**

Two G.I.´s had run into Jonathan before he stepped into City Hall and they'd told him that he could find the Citizens´ Office on the first floor. He felt his heart pounding as he went up the stairs to the citizens´office.

The office was crowded and Jonathan just looked around for a few seconds. He heard voices everywhere, speaking simultaneously, a mish-mash of German and English. He noticed MP´s sitting at desks and counters. They were obviously helping the Civil Service. Jonathan walked over to one of the counters.

"Excuse me, could you help me, please?", Jonathan asked politely, looking at the MP sitting in front of him. "I´m looking for the Wentzler family."

The MP glanced at him. "Do you have an address, boy?"

Jonathan shook his head. "No, no I don´t have an address."

"Do you know the disctrict where they live, in Wiesbaden?", the MP asked.

"No, no...", Jonathan stuttered, "I don´t know. The Wentzler family had been living in the States until recently. But now, I believe they returned here."

"But don´t you have at least an address, boy?"

"No, I ..the name is Wentzler. Martin and Erika Wentzler. They have two children, Martin Jr. and Alexandra. Mr. Wentzler is a diplomat and.. they lived in the States for about 4 years before being sent back here. Maybe you have some records, where.."

"Boy, are you kidding?", the MP interrupted him harshly. "Look around you! The computers don´t work and the archive is half-destroyed. We are happy to have at least some information about the town again."

"But someone should be able to tell me something!", Jonathan shouted. "Maybe I could get more information somewhere else, in another office?"

"I´m sorry, boy", the MP said and shook his head. "At the moment, we are the only working administrative machinery. Ask the people around here, maybe they can help you."

Jonathan wanted to say something, but then he became silent.

"I´m really sorry, boy", the MP said softly, looking at Jonathan.

"Thanks though", Jonathan whispered and left the counter, hanging his head.

For a few seconds, he just stood in the middle of the office. People passed by him, some of them bumping into him. What was he to do now? Who could he ask?

_What is all this technology good for, or all these computers, when they don´t work now, when they are really needed?´ _Jonathan thought.

But he still had his pictures - maybe someone knew Alexandra.

Jonathan put his sea-bag down, pulled out the fotos and started to ask around in the office. He didn´t speak German, but he did know the German word for family. He would lightly tap people on their shoulder, with Alexandra´s photo in his hand. He showed the picture to the people, asking "Alexandra Wentzler? Familie Wentzler?" over and over again, but everybody he asked in the office just shook their heads.

Jonathan gripped his sea-bag, put it over his shoulder and went downstairs, to leave the building. Outside, he tried to stop everybody who crossed his way, showing the picture and asking, "Familie Wentzler?" over and over again, but either he got an answer he couldn´t understand or the people just shook their heads.

Jonathan didn´t know how long he had been asking people. He walked across, all the way over to the marketplace to ask anyone he could see, but he just got the same answer over and over again.With every no, his hope decreased, his hope of finding someone who could help him. Exhausted, Jonathan sat down on a small bricklayer at the edge of the marketplace. He pressed Alexandra´s photo to his forehead, almost as if hoping she could tell him through the picture where to find her. Jonathan closed his eyes and supported his head with his hands, still holding the picture.

_Alex, tell me where you are. Please tell me where you are!´_

"Suchst Du die Wentzlers, Junge?"

Jonathan snapped out of his thoughts and looked up. He had heard a voice right next to him.  
He noticed a friendly, elderly woman sitting next to him, looking at him.

"Suchst Du die Wentzlers, Junge?", the elder woman asked him again in German, but Jonathan couldn't understand a word. He shook his head and shrugged his shoulders as if to say, _"I don't understand you.."_

The elderly woman pointed to the photo.

"Alexandra Wentzler? You are looking for the Wentzlers?", she asked, this time in perfect English.

_Oh my God!´, _thought Jonathan, _She knows Alexandra, she knows Alexandra!´_

"Please Ma´am, tell me!" Jonathan almost shouted, looking at the woman. "Do you know her?"

The woman smiled at Jonathan.

"Yes, my son. I do know her. I´ve worked for the Wentzler family. I was their housekeeper", she said softly.

Jonathan touched her arm.

"Please! Did you see her? Where can I find her?"

"I didn´t see the family after they moved to the States, but I still have their old address. Maybe they are there again."

_Oh my God, oh my God!´_ thought Jonathan again.

With shaking hands, he opened his sea-bag to pull out a piece of paper and a pen to write down the address. The woman took them out of Jonathan´s hands, wrote the address down and then drew something.

"It´s not far from here", the woman said softly.

Jonathan felt his heart pound and his hands were still shaking when the woman passed him the paper back.

"They lived at Spohrstrasse. Maybe they are there again."

Jonathan looked at the woman and his eyes filled with tears.

"You were surely sent by heaven", he whispered. "How.. how can I ever thank you?"

"Go, my son", she said, pointing in the direction Jonathan had to go. "Go and find your love."

Jonathan took both her hands in his and kissed them.

"God bless you, Ma´am."

Then, Jonathan gripped his sea-bag and rushed across the market-place.


	35. The Warning

**Chapter 35 (The Warning)**

Jonathan ran as fast as he could.

His lungs were burning and his heart was beating like crazy. He could have run through without stopping once, but he had to stop over and over again to ask the people passing by for Spohrstrasse No. 10.

_Oh Alexandra! I´ll be with you soon, darling! I can´t wait to see you again!´,_ flashed into Jonathan´s mind.

Couple of times he turned onto the wrong street and he had to run back to ask for the right way. Then he noticed a signpost with the words "Spohrstrasse" on it. He had finally made it!

Jonathan was completely out of breath.

He put down his sea-bag and leant against a wall on the street-corner. He closed his eyes and tried to recover his breath. Suddenly Jonathan could feel himself getting nervous. He had wanted for so long to find Alexandra and now this moment had come! But what if the old lady was wrong and Alexandra and her family didn´t lived here anymore? What if Alexandra ...?

"No, Jonathan! You know, that´s not true. You know that she´s alive. You can feel it, that she´s alive. So stop thinking about it!", he said to himself. He could feel his body trembling and his hands started to sweat.

_My God, I must look terrible. I can´t pop up at Alexandra's like this.´,_ Jonathan thought.

He adjusted his flying suit and dusted it off. He ran his fingers through his hair and he straightened the collar of his overall. He took out the necklace with the amulet on it, Alexandra´s gift of love.

_Alexandra should see I´m wearing her necklace.´,_ Jonathan thought.

Jonathan was ready. He bent to pick up his sea-bag again when he could hear a familiar voice.

_+"Jonathan, don´t do this! Don´t go! There is still time, turn back."+ _

It was Scarecrow.

"What is it! I told you, you can´t stop me", Jonathan said.

_+"I´m just trying to protect you. I´m just trying to save you from getting hurt. Go home, Jonathan. There is still time.."+ _

"Be quiet and quit playing your little games!", Jonathan shouted. "This is my life and you´ll kindly keep out of it!"

Jonathan noticed a few passing people staring at him. He had obviously yelled out loudly. And this time, Scarecrow was silent.

Jonathan took a deep breath, put the sea-bag over his shoulder and stepped onto Spohrstrasse very slowly. His eyes moved along ths walls of the houses, looking for house number 10. And then, there it was! Spohrstrasse number 10!

Jonathan crossed the street. He could feel his pounding heart going faster and faster. With shaking hands, Jonathan opened the little door to the front garden and stepped inside. He walked through the garden very slowly, then went up to the front door of the house. He noticed the door bell and read the name-plate above. WENTZLER´, it read.

_Oh my God!´,_ Jonathan thought. _They are here, they´re still here. I´ve found them. I´ve found Alexandra. My search is over!´_

_+"Jonathan, leave! There is still time!"+ _

And Jonathan ignored Scarecrow as he rang the door bell.


	36. The Message

**Chapter 36 (The Message)**

Again, Jonathan´s heart was pounding, as he heard footsteps approaching the door.

He could hear the door being unlocked. Then it opened and Jonathan saw Mrs. Wentzler standing in front of him.

"Hello, Mrs. Wentzler." he said softly.

Mrs. Wentzler gasped and for a split second they just looked at each other.

"My God, Jonathan!", she shouted and touched Jonathan´s arm. "Is it really you?"

She stepped forward and embraced Jonathan. He returned her hug. Then Mrs. Wentzler looked at Jonathan.

"Oh, it´s so nice to see you again, boy.", she said softly and waved him in. "But please, come in."

"Thank you.", Jonathan said and stepped in.

Only then he realized how much Mrs. Wentzler had changed. He could remember her being a good-humored, kind lady with a cheery, powerful voice. Now she looked sad and depressed, her voice had become weak and faltered. Her skin was very pale and she seemed to have aged years in just a short time. And only now did Jonathan realize that Mrs. Wentzler was dressed all in black.

"Can I offer you something to drink? You must be thirsty after your long trip.", Mrs. Wentzler asked as she led Jonathan into the living room.

He shook his head.

"No, thank you.", Jonathan said politely.

He wanted to ask Mrs. Wentzler where she was, where Alexandra was. On the other hand he didn´t want to be rude, since Alexandra´s family had always treated him well when they still lived in Gotham. Jonathan wanted to inquire after Mrs. Wentzler´s condition, but he couldn't, because the next moment he heard a boy's voice, shouting his name. Little Martin had rushed into the living room, with a toy in his hand.

"Jonathan, Jonathan!", he shouted, ran over him and threw himself at Jonathan.

"Hey, Martin!", Jonathan shouted in surprise, with a tone of joy in his voice and lifted up the little boy.

As badly as he wanted to know where Alexandra was, he was happy to see little Martin again. Jonathan hugged him quickly, then he put him down again. He looked over at Mrs. Wentzler and he could see tears filling up her eyes.

"Mrs. Wentzler.", he whispered and swallowed heavily. "Where is she?"

Mrs. Wentzler didn´t reply. She looked at Martin.

"Dear, please be so kind and go upstairs to your room."

Martin started to say something but then his mother hissed, "Right now!"

Martin pouted and turned to go upstairs to his room. Jonathan and Mrs. Wentzler looked at each other.

"Where is Alexandra.. Mrs. Wentzler?", Jonathan asked again.

He tried to stay calm but he was trembling.

"Jonathan.. please.. have a seat.", Mrs. Wentzler whispered and touched Jonathan´s arm, but he pulled away.

"No...no..", he said, his voice trembling. "I want to know where Alexandra is...where is she?"

Jonathan could hear his voice getting louder and louder with every word. Mrs. Wentzler sighed heavily.

"Jonathan, there was a bomb attack about one and a half weeks ago. My husband and Alexandra were out, on their way home, when...", Mrs. Wentzler whispered and tears were now streaming down her face. "My husband was killed in the attack, you understand? There were so many dead people all over..."

Jonathan gasped for air. His eyes filled up with tears and his whole body was trembling.

"And Alexandra? What happened to her? Where is she?", Jonathan shouted, out of control.

He had started to cry.

"Jonathan, she just couldn't have survived this attack! Don´t you think she would have come back home, long ago, if she was still alive!", Mrs. Wentzler yelled and sobbed. "Alexandra is dead, don´t you understand!"

"No, that´s not true!", Jonathan shouted, his voice choked with tears. "Even you are not sure she´s dead! She could be anywhere, injured, needing our help!"

But he didn't seem to believe the words either, even as he said them.

"Jonathan, I´m sorry! I´m so sorry!", Mrs. Wentzler whispered as Jonathan uttered a loud wail of desparation and started to cry bitterly.

He had to clutch the banisters, because he could feel his knees give way. He was crying Alexandra´s name over and over again.

"I´m sorry! I´m so sorry!", Mrs. Wentzler kept saying over and over again, trying to embrace Jonathan.

But he broke away from her and stumbled to the front door, still crying.

"Jonathan!", Mrs. Wentzler shouted after him, as he wrenched the door open and ran, out of and away from the Wentzler´s house.


	37. The beginning of the end

**Chapter 37 (The beginning of the end)**

Jonathan ran down Spohrstrasse.

He was still crying bitterly and the tears wouldn't stop running down his face. He screamed over and over again.

_+"Jonathan, Jonathan! Please - stop!", _ he could hear Scarecrow shouting, but Jonathan couldn´t - and didn´t want to - stop. He kept on running down the street, crossing a large open space, in the direction of the Rhine river. He ran up to the promenade and finally stopped at the balustrade. Jonathan was still crying and screaming. His hands clutched the rails of the balustrade.

_+"Why didn´t you listen to me, Jonathan? I didn´t want this to happen to you. Why didn´t you listen to me!"+ _

Jonathan couldn't say anything. He was still crying.

"No, Alexandra is not dead!", he shouted, his voice still choked with tears. "I really could feel it! I really could feel her, alive!"

_+"Why don´t you accept it, Alexandra is dead, Jonathan! I wanted to protect you. I tried to protect you from yourself the entire time. But you have killed her yourself! You have killed her with your love!"+ _

"That´s not true!", cried Jonathan. "That´s would never be true!"

_+"You know it´s true! You just don't want to accept that she is gone. You did everything to drive her away, to her death! Your night with her, your visit to the embassy, your visions in the park, your revolt against me, your trip to Germany - I always wanted the best for you! But you believed those who lied to you, betrayed you the whole time! And you sealed your girlfriend´s fate, her death, with your love. You have killed her, yourself! You have killed her with your love!"+ _

Jonathan looked up at the sky, still sobbing hard. His heart was broken. He was a broken man now. Scarecrow was right. He had killed Alexandra! He had killed her with his love! And he would never, ever let things get this far, this out-of-control again!

Jonathan reached into the side-pocket of his overalls and pulled out the gun Mr. Walker had given him. Scarecrow screamed when Jonathan turned the gun around, pressing its barrell against his mouth.

_+"Jonathan, listen. Just listen to me for a moment!", _ he could hear Scarecrow pleading, as Jonathan placed his thumb on the trigger of the gun, trembling.

_ +"You don´t have to do this. Killing yourself won´t bring back Alexandra!"+ _

- The young girl had just come to... -

"My life is over! What shall I do now, without her?", Jonathan whispered in dispair, looking down at the barrel of the gun.

_+"Jonathan, you don´t know what I can show you. There are so many things I can show you. Things you wouldn't have even dared to dream about before..."+ _

- She was in so much pain. She couldn´t remember anything, not even her name. The nurses had told her that she had been hospitalized a week ago. She moaned in pain now, as she got out of the bed and slowly walked over to the window. A grille made of wire was installed on the window. The girl´s fingers clutched the grille. The sun was already low and the waters of the Rhine glittered in the soft light of the sunset...-

_+"Jonathan, I can show you the things you don´t know, things you don't even know exist. I can show you how to achieve power."+ _

- Her right shoulder was throbbing in pain and gingerly, she touched it. They had told her that she had lost a lot of blood over the last few days and now, she could feel a sharp pain in her lower body. The pain reminded her of what they had told her, Of what they said had happened to her... -

_+"I can give you the power to do what you have always wanted to do, Jonathan. The power to punish all those who have hurt you. To punish those who have lied to you and betrayed you!"+ _

Jonathan took the gun away from his mouth. Scarecrow smiled.

_+"You´re doing the right thing, Jonathan."+  
_

- They had told her that she had been found in a narrow lane. They had told her that she had been raped. They had told her that she had been 3 months pregnant and that she had lost her child as a result of the rape. They had told her that she had been cut deeply with a knife on her right shoulder... -

"What will happen now?" Jonathan asked sadly.

_+"Revenge! My precious Jonathan! Nothing but sweet revenge! You will punish them, all of them. And you will start here"+ _, hissed Scarecrow and Jonathan looked at the gun in his hand.

- But who was she? Who had been the father of her child? Who had raped her? She couldn´t remember anything... -

_+"You will be a good boy and first, study hard when you´re in Gotham again, Jonathan. And then you will have better weapons, smarter weapons than just a crude gun. You will have something that you deserve. But the gun will do its good here. Now - charge the gun."+ _

Jonathan hesitated, but then he heard Scarecrow saying again.

_+"Go Jonathan! Charge the gun!"+ _

Jonathan did and Scarecrow chuckled when he listened to the click of the gun.

_+"And now, hide it again!"+ _

Jonathan put the gun on saftey and hid it again in his side-pocket.

- Still lost in her thoughts, the girl´s gaze moved over the waters of the Rhine river, to the riverside, then over to the promenade, up to its balustrade. She noticed a young man. He was wearing a blue flying suit and combat boots. He seemed to be very young, too young to be a soldier.

"Are you just another lost soul, like me?", the girl whispered, holding out her hand, as if she could touch and caress the young man through the window.

She felt her heart getting heavy as she looked at him and tears filled up her eyes... -

Jonathan swore to himself that he would never, ever love anybody again! He would take revenge on them all, all those who had lied and betrayed him. He would get his revenge and he would kill anybody who got in his way!

- Then the young soldier turned around, so the girl could see his face. A sudden, sharp pain flashed through her and she was so terrified that she almost thought her heart would stop!...  
Suddenly she knew who she was. She knew her name - she was Alexandra, Alexandra Wentzler! Suddenly she remembered everything that had happened! -

Alexandra could remember the bomb attack, when her father had been killed. She could remember stumbling through the streets. She could remember the three men who had pursued her, who had forced her into the narrow lane. She could remember how she had been raped. She could remember being stabbed on her shoulder with a knife. She could remember the horrible pain. She could remember lying there, on the cold wet stone in the narrow lane. She could remember thinking about her child, carrying it under her heart. She thought of him now, that child she had lost. She thought of him. She thought of her sweetheart, the father of her baby. She thought of Jonathan!.. -

And now she could see him standing outside, crying, broken..

- "Jonathan!", she screamed as loudly as she could and flailed against the grille. "Jonathan, I´m here, I´m up here!"  
Alexandra was screaming louder now and she punched the grille again, hard as she could... -

"So, where do we start?", Jonathan whispered and touched the side-bag where the gun was hidden.

- "No Jonathan, don´t! Don´t do it! Please don´t do it!" Alexandra yelled, still punching the grille... -

Scarecrow giggled, as Jonathan started to turn.

- Alexandra looked helplessly after Jonathan, her body paralyzed by the stitching pain, screaming and crying...-

The sun went down as Jonathan slowly walked down the street, back again, back to where he came from.

Back again, to the Wentzler´s house...

THE END +


End file.
